A sort of father's day ficlet
Jun. 20th, 2004 01:06 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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rugbytackleI wrote this one some time ago and with a few silly adjustments, finally decided to post. It's a roundabout Father's Day story.
Story line: The boys introduce the 'IT' pants of the summer.
Pairing: S/V, implied others
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: no money, no knowledge, no harm
I've used a few familiar names in the story, hope no one is offended!
Title: Shabby Chic Pants
Note: a few years ago, Shabby Chic introduced bed linens made from extra soft t-shirt material. Even Oprah was raving about them.
Feedback: sure!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The feel was amazing. So incredibly soft and comfortable. No binding anywhere, fluidly moving with you, draped perfectly around your curves and dips. Just walking around the house felt like floating on a cloud. The experience made perfect by the lack of anything to impede the direct contact with smugly satisfied skin.
The ringing phone rudely brings him out of his enthralled state. "Hello?" he answers in a soft husky drawl. "Hey Viggo, it's León from the gallery." "Hey León, how's it going?" "Good for me. I hate to bother you but the lighting technicians are here and I know you want to work with them to set everything up for the show." "Oh yeah, definitely. Tell them I'll be right down, okay?" "Good. See ya soon."
Hanging up, he moves to the door but realizes that he has forgotten a shirt. Lithely jogging back to the bedroom, he grabs a t-shirt from the 'good' drawer. He knows it's the good drawer because Henry painted the word "GooD" on it when he was six as a Father's Day gift. Henry also painted the "BADDD" drawer for all the paint ruined shirts, the "UNdeRs" drawer for underwear and socks, and "?" for those items they never were sure belonged anywhere but Viggo couldn't bear to part from.
Turning to leave, he catches a glimpse of his reflection showcasing his new pants for the first time. He'd been blasé when he and Sean had found them in a tiny little boutique in London. The store owners and designers had explained that they were made from prewashed t-shirt material, much like the sheets made famous years prior. They had felt nice to the touch and Sean had sworn by their comfort.
He grins thinking fondly of Sean's modeling of their purchases back at the hotel. The sight of the Brit's perfectly shaped ass in those pants had spurred Viggo into a heated chase around the room, leering and grabbing as Sean yelped and half-heartedly tried to escape. Many slurs against the nature of Viggo's parents later, the other benefit of easy removal had been discovered to their mutual satisfaction.
Wryly adjusting his sudden erection, Viggo knows he'd better not think about Sean or these pants will quickly become too obscene for public. Grinning broadly, he thinks suddenly of Sean's refusal to let Lorna buy a pair.
Thank god for sons! Although Henry's new girlfriend was making every protective parental instinct come out. He knew he'd regret admitting in GQ to having had sex so early. And Henry's smirk every time he left for a date was adding grey hair exponentially.
"OK, pants, shirt, shoes in truck, check." Almost outside the door, he realizes that not only had he forgotten the keys but also his wallet. Grabbing up his American Indian designed pouch, that Dom insists on calling his "purse", he finally successfully gets out through the door and into the truck.
Soon, he arrives at the gallery where he finds the usual stalemate in progress. Workmen and gallery employees never seem to mix well no matter what country. On one side, the three electricians, who are all middle-aged men with slight pot bellies and the requisite low hanging work pants, stand warily eyeing the rather flamboyant staff organizing the show literature.
Pretending to ignore them, the gallery staff enjoy the uneasiness and find subtle but effective ways of torturing the three men with little comments whispered slightly too loudly. "Oh, my my my my my, the moon forgot to set this mornin' I see." "I can now confirm that there are still men who have not yet received a handy-dandy nose hair trimmer for Daddy's Day."
Huddled for protection, the electricians were having their own debate. "Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, what do they call that color hair?" "Oh shit, that guy's got his tit pierced! You don't think there's more?...Down there?" "Is that a guy?"
Into this stand-off, Viggo enters with gentle smiles for all. "Hey León! Trey and Hajib, good to see you!" Big smiles from all and León quickly sends the other two back to work as he moves with Viggo over to the work crew.
"Viggo, let me introduce you to Peter. He's the head electrician." Shaking hands firmly, Viggo murmurs "Peter? That's my Dad's middle name you know?" The older man is staring in bemusement. He hadn't known who the artist was until this moment.
"Uh, aren't you the guy from LOTR and Crimson Tide?" Smiling softly, Viggo nods. "You liked Crimson Tide? Weren't Gene Hackman and Denzel Washington incredible?" All three men are grinning widely and nodding in sync. "And Tony Soprano was in it too!" "Yeah, James is a great actor. That was his big break ya know."
"Well, my wife always says I look kind of like George Dzunda, so she loves that movie." Staring at Peter, Viggo nods "you do kinda, your face and eyes. I love him. He's just a total class act. Really good person. And shit, so fucking funny you almost piss your pants." The three electricians drink in the inside information like water after the desert.
Viggo further wins their unwavering support when he softly says "I'm so relieved you're okay with me working with you on the lighting. I'm sure you'll know exactly how to get the effect I'm going for with each piece." Their heads rise with pride and eagerness to do this job perfectly.
León and Trey watch amused as Viggo leads them over to the first wall, the three following like the happiest of dogs after their master. "Does it every time! He's fucking unbelievable", murmured León. But Trey has caught sight of Viggo's rear as he gracefully walks through the gallery. "No, THAT'S unbelievable! Ohmygod, that ASS is so fine."
Not willing to admit he has just thought the same thing, León scowls. "Leave Viggo alone, Trey. We've got to get the gallery finished and we're already behind. You've got quite a lot to do." "Spoilsport! If you weren't straight you'd be all over him too." In a huff, Trey heads back to the front reception desk.
Sneaking another look at Viggo as he was energetically using his hands to demonstrate to the technicians, who were all beaming and nodding, León makes a mental note to ask Viggo where he got his pants. Maybe he'd finally get a blowjob from his new girlfriend once she saw his package in those pants. Vaguely he worries if it wasn't the pants that were so great but Viggo's ass in them that made the difference.
At the desk, Trey makes a secretive call to a friend down the street who owns a funky clothing store. "Robbie, you HAVE to get down here, pronto! V's here and has the most bootylicious pants I have ever seen on a human male in my life!" "Considering how many males you know, slut, these pants must be something special!" "Bastard! Just get your skanky ass over here."
Scant minutes later, a breathless Robbie comes careening into the gallery. Attempting to pretend nonchalance, he waves at the staff and helps himself to a water bottle. "Hey boys, how's it going today?" León shoots him and then Trey a suspicious look but the phone ringing forces his attention away. Surreptiously glancing around, Robbie's eyes bulge out as they finally fall on Viggo's rear as he crouches down to demonstrate for the workmen. Exchanging hubba hubba looks of appreciation with Trey, he moves over to the four men.
"Hey Viggo! Long time no see! How are you, man?" Glancing up, Viggo stands and smiles politely, "hey Robbie. How's it goin'?" "Fabu, babe, just couldn't be better! So, whatcha doin'?" "Oh, Peter, Ramon, and Alexsei are creating the light effects for the show. They're kindly bearing with my suggestions", which brings a chuckle from the three work men. "Umm, interesting", comments Robbie convincing no one that he means it. The three electricians dismiss him as Viggo grins at their response.
Brushing over Viggo's ass, Robbie comments, "are these new?". Staring at the shop owner, Viggo replies "yeah and Robbie...don't touch my ass again without my permission, okay?" Shocked, the three work men look to see Robbie wave off the objection with an insolent shrug. "Well, darling, if you insist. In those pants, it's nearly impossible to restrain myself. C'mon, sweetie, don't pout. Come over with me so I can see you in all your beatnik glory." Winsomely tugging on Viggo's arm, he bats his lashes as Viggo unwillingly laughs. "Geez! Peter, can you please excuse me for a minute?"
Seeing their assent, he moves over to a brighter lit section of the gallery as Robbie interlocks their hands and and swings their arms like kids in grade school. Viggo snickers and lightly smacks the other man's shoulder. Despite being a royal pain in the ass, the shop owner is pretty amusing in his own way, especially when he isn't being catty toward others. Still chuffing, Viggo does an unconsciously graceful athletic circle. Robbie is 'oo'ing and 'ah'ing.
"You should not be allowed out of your house with those on! Men, women, and anyone in between will be having traffic accidents, falling off sidewalk curbs, and generally causing mayhem crashing into doors and such. I MUST know where you got them! Can I beg you to see the tag?" Making a move to the back waist of Viggo's pants, his hand is caught in a gentle yet implacable grip. "No, you can't see the tag, you pervert!" Viggo growls at him, obviously aware of Robbie's true intentions to cop a feel during the inspection.
"Oh I die every time you growl at me in that husky voice! Rowr! Can't blame a girl for trying, sweet cheeks." Viggo just scowls, fighting a laugh. Robbie was incorrigible. If you weren't careful, he'd have his hands down your pants before you could say hello. "C'mon, just tell me where you got them? Pwetty, please with whipped cream and a cherry on top?" "Oh for god's sake, I got them in England at a store run by two woman designers named Saira Raven and Kris Isern, the store is called Liar's Dance. :-)
"London, hmmm? Oh god, tell me that Orlando Bloom has a pair as well, my precious? ALL my fantasies would be met if I could just see the two of you in these pants together! I could die happy then." Viggo snorts trying hard to fight his memory of not Orli's but Sean's ass as it was slowly revealed by the loosening of the tie strings around the waist during their madcap chase. "I don't know where else they are sellin' 'em. I'm not sure they have a US distributor yet." Robbie's eyes switch in an instant from lust to avaricious greed.
"Viggo if I can make a deal with them, would you pose for an ad for me?" "Fuck no!" "Oh, but Viggy, I don't know if anyone else's ass could look as fine as yours in them. Well beyond Orlando. And sweetie, I just have to say, I adore that you're goin' commando in them." Viggo blanches and quickly glances down at his crotch wondering what's showing that shouldn't be. Damn that memory of Sean.
Robbie giggles, "no love, no dark curlies showing. There's just no panty lines, love, and you have, let's say, a certain lovely looseness in the front that suggests a level of freedom for the boys." Viggo's ears are crimson as he swats the other's hovering hands away from that sensitive area. "Hey! I told you no touching! Look I'm really busy. You're got the store and designers' names." "Now, now, Viggo, don't be embarrassed. You've got a very nice package as we all know. It's okay to show off a bit." Viggo chuckles nervously as he almost runs away back to the safety of the work crew.
"Trey! I'm sending you two dozen red roses and a bottle of champagne! You wouldn't happen to still have that little digital camera would you?" With conspiring grins, they manage to snap off a few pictures before Robbie strolls out with visions of money and half-naked gorgeous men dancing in his mind.
```````````````````````
A few weeks pass, the exhibit opens with great success. Viggo is busy getting ready to go on location in Canada when he gets an early morning call from Sean. "So, you, I, and Orli are officially having a threesome." "Whaaaat?" Husky chuckles waft in the air. "Yeh, according to that piece of tabloid shite, The Mirror."
"Sean?! What the hell are they talking about?" More chuckles, "well, apparently somebody talked to those lovely ladies at Liar's Dance and found out that we all bought those t-shirt pants there. They're running piccies of all us in 'em on the bloody front page. Orli's arse shot is the biggest, of course."
"Poor elf! Aw christ! I love those pants. They're practically all I wear anymore." Snickering, Sean replies, "me too, luv. Every time I do, it reminds me of you." "Oh yeah babe, although sometimes those arousing reminders happen in public places. (chuckles) So, what does the story say beyond displaying our ASSets?"
"Wanker! Well, teh article says somepin about how we bought 'em, how we talked about gettin' Orli some too. So, of course, we bought 'em for our 'other' lover." "Ah, yes. We all want to dress alike, right?" Snorts erupt, "can you imagine us in one of his god-awful shirts?" Giggles broke out on both sides of the ocean. "What's Orli saying about this?"
"Oh, he thinks it's hilarious of course. And Vig, you won't believe it but just yesterday, Eric went in and bought some, telling the ladies that Orli sent him!" "(Heehee) No way! Oh god, that's hysterical! Come to think of it, I think Dommie mentioned that he had just bought some for Lij and Billy when he went home last week!" Full bellied laughter rolls back and forth over the line.
"Hey, we better make sure to order some for Ian and John or they'll feel left out." "Maybe Brett wants to sub for John on those too!" "And don't forget Karl and David!" "Yeah, pants for all of the gang. Think Peter would wear a pair?" Chuffs and raspy giggles overcome them again.
"Well, we are a close group." "Yeh, we always said we had the best lookin' and best arsed cast ever assembled." "I always knew my other cast mates tasted good, I mean had good taste!" Nearly silent laughter reigns again. "Umm, Sean, I love you." Warm silence then a husky reply "love you too, crazy bugger. So, I'll be seeing you in about 2 weeks up in Vancouver?" "Yeah, and bring your pants with you so I can take my time removing them at the earliest possible convenience." (Moan) "This time you won't even have to chase meh."
`````````````````````````
The pants become the 'IT' article of clothing in several entertainment magazines. Most frequently shown in the accompanying photos are Orlando and Elijah in the U.S. while David and Karl are predominant in the Aussie Mags. The Mirror runs another of Sean as he scowls at Lorna who has obviously found a way to buy her own pair. Viggo does make the tabloids once more in them, when he is caught down at the beach throwing frisbees for the dogs. Two conspicuous patches of wet sand embellish his nicely rounded bum.
````````````````````````
On Father's Day, two different men receive nearly the same gift.
Sean is delighted to unwrap a new pair of the t-shirt pants, this time in a shorts version. The home made addition of a painted label over the crotch draws huge chuckles
"Warning - Property of Viggo Mortensen"
"No Trespassing!"
Meanwhile, at Peter the electrician's house, his wife chuckles to herself as she wraps a pair for her 50 year old hubby. He still talks so fondly of his encounter with the actor, which she of course has dually recorded at Viggo Fan Base forums. In the box is a note.
"Just to remind you how nice and sexy, men over 45 can be.
Endorsed by your friend, Viggo."
The End!
Hope no one minds the use of their lj name??? :-)
*hugs to all*
Story line: The boys introduce the 'IT' pants of the summer.
Pairing: S/V, implied others
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: no money, no knowledge, no harm
I've used a few familiar names in the story, hope no one is offended!
Title: Shabby Chic Pants
Note: a few years ago, Shabby Chic introduced bed linens made from extra soft t-shirt material. Even Oprah was raving about them.
Feedback: sure!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The feel was amazing. So incredibly soft and comfortable. No binding anywhere, fluidly moving with you, draped perfectly around your curves and dips. Just walking around the house felt like floating on a cloud. The experience made perfect by the lack of anything to impede the direct contact with smugly satisfied skin.
The ringing phone rudely brings him out of his enthralled state. "Hello?" he answers in a soft husky drawl. "Hey Viggo, it's León from the gallery." "Hey León, how's it going?" "Good for me. I hate to bother you but the lighting technicians are here and I know you want to work with them to set everything up for the show." "Oh yeah, definitely. Tell them I'll be right down, okay?" "Good. See ya soon."
Hanging up, he moves to the door but realizes that he has forgotten a shirt. Lithely jogging back to the bedroom, he grabs a t-shirt from the 'good' drawer. He knows it's the good drawer because Henry painted the word "GooD" on it when he was six as a Father's Day gift. Henry also painted the "BADDD" drawer for all the paint ruined shirts, the "UNdeRs" drawer for underwear and socks, and "?" for those items they never were sure belonged anywhere but Viggo couldn't bear to part from.
Turning to leave, he catches a glimpse of his reflection showcasing his new pants for the first time. He'd been blasé when he and Sean had found them in a tiny little boutique in London. The store owners and designers had explained that they were made from prewashed t-shirt material, much like the sheets made famous years prior. They had felt nice to the touch and Sean had sworn by their comfort.
He grins thinking fondly of Sean's modeling of their purchases back at the hotel. The sight of the Brit's perfectly shaped ass in those pants had spurred Viggo into a heated chase around the room, leering and grabbing as Sean yelped and half-heartedly tried to escape. Many slurs against the nature of Viggo's parents later, the other benefit of easy removal had been discovered to their mutual satisfaction.
Wryly adjusting his sudden erection, Viggo knows he'd better not think about Sean or these pants will quickly become too obscene for public. Grinning broadly, he thinks suddenly of Sean's refusal to let Lorna buy a pair.
Thank god for sons! Although Henry's new girlfriend was making every protective parental instinct come out. He knew he'd regret admitting in GQ to having had sex so early. And Henry's smirk every time he left for a date was adding grey hair exponentially.
"OK, pants, shirt, shoes in truck, check." Almost outside the door, he realizes that not only had he forgotten the keys but also his wallet. Grabbing up his American Indian designed pouch, that Dom insists on calling his "purse", he finally successfully gets out through the door and into the truck.
Soon, he arrives at the gallery where he finds the usual stalemate in progress. Workmen and gallery employees never seem to mix well no matter what country. On one side, the three electricians, who are all middle-aged men with slight pot bellies and the requisite low hanging work pants, stand warily eyeing the rather flamboyant staff organizing the show literature.
Pretending to ignore them, the gallery staff enjoy the uneasiness and find subtle but effective ways of torturing the three men with little comments whispered slightly too loudly. "Oh, my my my my my, the moon forgot to set this mornin' I see." "I can now confirm that there are still men who have not yet received a handy-dandy nose hair trimmer for Daddy's Day."
Huddled for protection, the electricians were having their own debate. "Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, what do they call that color hair?" "Oh shit, that guy's got his tit pierced! You don't think there's more?...Down there?" "Is that a guy?"
Into this stand-off, Viggo enters with gentle smiles for all. "Hey León! Trey and Hajib, good to see you!" Big smiles from all and León quickly sends the other two back to work as he moves with Viggo over to the work crew.
"Viggo, let me introduce you to Peter. He's the head electrician." Shaking hands firmly, Viggo murmurs "Peter? That's my Dad's middle name you know?" The older man is staring in bemusement. He hadn't known who the artist was until this moment.
"Uh, aren't you the guy from LOTR and Crimson Tide?" Smiling softly, Viggo nods. "You liked Crimson Tide? Weren't Gene Hackman and Denzel Washington incredible?" All three men are grinning widely and nodding in sync. "And Tony Soprano was in it too!" "Yeah, James is a great actor. That was his big break ya know."
"Well, my wife always says I look kind of like George Dzunda, so she loves that movie." Staring at Peter, Viggo nods "you do kinda, your face and eyes. I love him. He's just a total class act. Really good person. And shit, so fucking funny you almost piss your pants." The three electricians drink in the inside information like water after the desert.
Viggo further wins their unwavering support when he softly says "I'm so relieved you're okay with me working with you on the lighting. I'm sure you'll know exactly how to get the effect I'm going for with each piece." Their heads rise with pride and eagerness to do this job perfectly.
León and Trey watch amused as Viggo leads them over to the first wall, the three following like the happiest of dogs after their master. "Does it every time! He's fucking unbelievable", murmured León. But Trey has caught sight of Viggo's rear as he gracefully walks through the gallery. "No, THAT'S unbelievable! Ohmygod, that ASS is so fine."
Not willing to admit he has just thought the same thing, León scowls. "Leave Viggo alone, Trey. We've got to get the gallery finished and we're already behind. You've got quite a lot to do." "Spoilsport! If you weren't straight you'd be all over him too." In a huff, Trey heads back to the front reception desk.
Sneaking another look at Viggo as he was energetically using his hands to demonstrate to the technicians, who were all beaming and nodding, León makes a mental note to ask Viggo where he got his pants. Maybe he'd finally get a blowjob from his new girlfriend once she saw his package in those pants. Vaguely he worries if it wasn't the pants that were so great but Viggo's ass in them that made the difference.
At the desk, Trey makes a secretive call to a friend down the street who owns a funky clothing store. "Robbie, you HAVE to get down here, pronto! V's here and has the most bootylicious pants I have ever seen on a human male in my life!" "Considering how many males you know, slut, these pants must be something special!" "Bastard! Just get your skanky ass over here."
Scant minutes later, a breathless Robbie comes careening into the gallery. Attempting to pretend nonchalance, he waves at the staff and helps himself to a water bottle. "Hey boys, how's it going today?" León shoots him and then Trey a suspicious look but the phone ringing forces his attention away. Surreptiously glancing around, Robbie's eyes bulge out as they finally fall on Viggo's rear as he crouches down to demonstrate for the workmen. Exchanging hubba hubba looks of appreciation with Trey, he moves over to the four men.
"Hey Viggo! Long time no see! How are you, man?" Glancing up, Viggo stands and smiles politely, "hey Robbie. How's it goin'?" "Fabu, babe, just couldn't be better! So, whatcha doin'?" "Oh, Peter, Ramon, and Alexsei are creating the light effects for the show. They're kindly bearing with my suggestions", which brings a chuckle from the three work men. "Umm, interesting", comments Robbie convincing no one that he means it. The three electricians dismiss him as Viggo grins at their response.
Brushing over Viggo's ass, Robbie comments, "are these new?". Staring at the shop owner, Viggo replies "yeah and Robbie...don't touch my ass again without my permission, okay?" Shocked, the three work men look to see Robbie wave off the objection with an insolent shrug. "Well, darling, if you insist. In those pants, it's nearly impossible to restrain myself. C'mon, sweetie, don't pout. Come over with me so I can see you in all your beatnik glory." Winsomely tugging on Viggo's arm, he bats his lashes as Viggo unwillingly laughs. "Geez! Peter, can you please excuse me for a minute?"
Seeing their assent, he moves over to a brighter lit section of the gallery as Robbie interlocks their hands and and swings their arms like kids in grade school. Viggo snickers and lightly smacks the other man's shoulder. Despite being a royal pain in the ass, the shop owner is pretty amusing in his own way, especially when he isn't being catty toward others. Still chuffing, Viggo does an unconsciously graceful athletic circle. Robbie is 'oo'ing and 'ah'ing.
"You should not be allowed out of your house with those on! Men, women, and anyone in between will be having traffic accidents, falling off sidewalk curbs, and generally causing mayhem crashing into doors and such. I MUST know where you got them! Can I beg you to see the tag?" Making a move to the back waist of Viggo's pants, his hand is caught in a gentle yet implacable grip. "No, you can't see the tag, you pervert!" Viggo growls at him, obviously aware of Robbie's true intentions to cop a feel during the inspection.
"Oh I die every time you growl at me in that husky voice! Rowr! Can't blame a girl for trying, sweet cheeks." Viggo just scowls, fighting a laugh. Robbie was incorrigible. If you weren't careful, he'd have his hands down your pants before you could say hello. "C'mon, just tell me where you got them? Pwetty, please with whipped cream and a cherry on top?" "Oh for god's sake, I got them in England at a store run by two woman designers named Saira Raven and Kris Isern, the store is called Liar's Dance. :-)
"London, hmmm? Oh god, tell me that Orlando Bloom has a pair as well, my precious? ALL my fantasies would be met if I could just see the two of you in these pants together! I could die happy then." Viggo snorts trying hard to fight his memory of not Orli's but Sean's ass as it was slowly revealed by the loosening of the tie strings around the waist during their madcap chase. "I don't know where else they are sellin' 'em. I'm not sure they have a US distributor yet." Robbie's eyes switch in an instant from lust to avaricious greed.
"Viggo if I can make a deal with them, would you pose for an ad for me?" "Fuck no!" "Oh, but Viggy, I don't know if anyone else's ass could look as fine as yours in them. Well beyond Orlando. And sweetie, I just have to say, I adore that you're goin' commando in them." Viggo blanches and quickly glances down at his crotch wondering what's showing that shouldn't be. Damn that memory of Sean.
Robbie giggles, "no love, no dark curlies showing. There's just no panty lines, love, and you have, let's say, a certain lovely looseness in the front that suggests a level of freedom for the boys." Viggo's ears are crimson as he swats the other's hovering hands away from that sensitive area. "Hey! I told you no touching! Look I'm really busy. You're got the store and designers' names." "Now, now, Viggo, don't be embarrassed. You've got a very nice package as we all know. It's okay to show off a bit." Viggo chuckles nervously as he almost runs away back to the safety of the work crew.
"Trey! I'm sending you two dozen red roses and a bottle of champagne! You wouldn't happen to still have that little digital camera would you?" With conspiring grins, they manage to snap off a few pictures before Robbie strolls out with visions of money and half-naked gorgeous men dancing in his mind.
```````````````````````
A few weeks pass, the exhibit opens with great success. Viggo is busy getting ready to go on location in Canada when he gets an early morning call from Sean. "So, you, I, and Orli are officially having a threesome." "Whaaaat?" Husky chuckles waft in the air. "Yeh, according to that piece of tabloid shite, The Mirror."
"Sean?! What the hell are they talking about?" More chuckles, "well, apparently somebody talked to those lovely ladies at Liar's Dance and found out that we all bought those t-shirt pants there. They're running piccies of all us in 'em on the bloody front page. Orli's arse shot is the biggest, of course."
"Poor elf! Aw christ! I love those pants. They're practically all I wear anymore." Snickering, Sean replies, "me too, luv. Every time I do, it reminds me of you." "Oh yeah babe, although sometimes those arousing reminders happen in public places. (chuckles) So, what does the story say beyond displaying our ASSets?"
"Wanker! Well, teh article says somepin about how we bought 'em, how we talked about gettin' Orli some too. So, of course, we bought 'em for our 'other' lover." "Ah, yes. We all want to dress alike, right?" Snorts erupt, "can you imagine us in one of his god-awful shirts?" Giggles broke out on both sides of the ocean. "What's Orli saying about this?"
"Oh, he thinks it's hilarious of course. And Vig, you won't believe it but just yesterday, Eric went in and bought some, telling the ladies that Orli sent him!" "(Heehee) No way! Oh god, that's hysterical! Come to think of it, I think Dommie mentioned that he had just bought some for Lij and Billy when he went home last week!" Full bellied laughter rolls back and forth over the line.
"Hey, we better make sure to order some for Ian and John or they'll feel left out." "Maybe Brett wants to sub for John on those too!" "And don't forget Karl and David!" "Yeah, pants for all of the gang. Think Peter would wear a pair?" Chuffs and raspy giggles overcome them again.
"Well, we are a close group." "Yeh, we always said we had the best lookin' and best arsed cast ever assembled." "I always knew my other cast mates tasted good, I mean had good taste!" Nearly silent laughter reigns again. "Umm, Sean, I love you." Warm silence then a husky reply "love you too, crazy bugger. So, I'll be seeing you in about 2 weeks up in Vancouver?" "Yeah, and bring your pants with you so I can take my time removing them at the earliest possible convenience." (Moan) "This time you won't even have to chase meh."
`````````````````````````
The pants become the 'IT' article of clothing in several entertainment magazines. Most frequently shown in the accompanying photos are Orlando and Elijah in the U.S. while David and Karl are predominant in the Aussie Mags. The Mirror runs another of Sean as he scowls at Lorna who has obviously found a way to buy her own pair. Viggo does make the tabloids once more in them, when he is caught down at the beach throwing frisbees for the dogs. Two conspicuous patches of wet sand embellish his nicely rounded bum.
````````````````````````
On Father's Day, two different men receive nearly the same gift.
Sean is delighted to unwrap a new pair of the t-shirt pants, this time in a shorts version. The home made addition of a painted label over the crotch draws huge chuckles
"Warning - Property of Viggo Mortensen"
"No Trespassing!"
Meanwhile, at Peter the electrician's house, his wife chuckles to herself as she wraps a pair for her 50 year old hubby. He still talks so fondly of his encounter with the actor, which she of course has dually recorded at Viggo Fan Base forums. In the box is a note.
"Just to remind you how nice and sexy, men over 45 can be.
Endorsed by your friend, Viggo."
The End!
Hope no one minds the use of their lj name??? :-)
*hugs to all*
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Date: 2004-06-20 07:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-06-20 08:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-06-21 03:21 am (UTC)Angie
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Date: 2004-06-21 04:32 am (UTC)These boys slash themselves!
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Date: 2004-06-21 06:05 pm (UTC)And I nearly fell over when I read this: England at a store run by two woman designers named Saira Raven and Kris Isern, the store is called Liar's Dance. :-)
Bwahahahahahaha too funny! I don't mind at all love! :)
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Date: 2004-06-21 06:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-06-21 10:30 pm (UTC)I read this! I read this and I read right over it, missed it completely till Saira sent me an email 'bout it! LOL
I want dibs on those pants!
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Date: 2004-06-22 04:16 am (UTC)*wanders away to dust off my sewing machine*
Blame your photo manips!
Date: 2004-06-22 07:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-06-26 10:16 am (UTC)Loved this, it was so funny *g*
And I can just see what sweet cheeks would look like in those pants *implodes*