Fluffy Fic
Aug. 26th, 2003 03:46 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
autumnsparkle.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
rugbytackleHi everybody! *waves*
I'm kinda new here, but if I had known that this community existed, I would have joined it ages ago already! I honestly thought that there weren't a lot of Vig/Sean-lovers around, but I'm glad to see that I was wrong!
Anyway, today I wrote my first slash-fic, and seeing that it's about our lovely men, I just had to post it here.
Title:Drawn
Author: AutumnSparkle
Disclaimer: As far as I know, Viggo never fell for Sean, the daft cow :P This is just my imagination...
Rating: PG13
Pairing: Viggo/Sean B
Summary: Viggo is desperately in love with his best friend... and I suck at summaries.
Feedback: Very much appreciated.
Note: This isn't checked by a BR unfortunately, so try to ignore any mistakes. Oh, and it's quite fluffy as well. If anyone would like to check it, I'd be very happy.
Warnings: This is slash, so if male/male relationships aren't your cup of tea, just don't read it!
Viggo mused.
Viggo mused and pondered and thought and the more he did so, the more he came to the conclusion that it probably was just temporary. Soon he would wake up and discover that it had all been just a phase, a silly crush, nothing to worry about. He would shrug it off, maybe laugh about it, laugh about the memory of not being able to concentrate on whatever he was doing and just get on with his life.
Except that he knew that it was more. More than a ‘silly crush’, more than just a temporary hormonal issue, oh, endlessly more. He never intended to fall for his best friend, never intended to fall for those icy blue eyes, that deep, soft voice or that beautiful, honest smile. And yet he had. He had fallen, hard and fast and deep, and he knew there was no turning back.
It had been a long time since he had been that captivated by someone, that mesmerised by every single word, every single touch and every single movement. It had been even a longer time since he had been in love with a guy. In fact he couldn’t even remember ever having fallen in love with a guy. There was just something about him, there was just something about Sean that had caught his attention and that had intrigued him, yet he couldn’t quite figure out what it was.
The only thing he knew was that if he didn’t do anything about it soon, he would probably go mad. Yet the mere thought of letting Sean know that he was the object of his unexpected affections scared him beyond belief, and the risk of ruining their friendship that was so precious to the both of them only added to his doubts.
So Viggo mused some more.
He imagined how Sean would react if he would tell him, what Sean would say or do, but none of the imagined reactions were encouraging. As far as he could tell, Sean still was as straight as always, so chances were slim that his feelings would be returned. And yet, there was a tiny sparkle of hope, a little voice in the back of his head that told him he had to go for it, see where it would lead to. If their friendship was as strong as he believed it was, Sean wouldn't abandon it because of what he felt, wouldn’t abandon him because of what he felt. And if the most unlikely of things would happen, if Sean would let him know that he had been struggling with the same thoughts and feelings, he knew he could die a happy death.
Being an artist, Viggo was used to do what his instincts told him, rather than let his mind overrule his heart, but this time it took him considerably longer to take the decision of indeed following his heart, to tell Sean what had been bothering him for weeks now.
And here he was, standing in front of Sean’s trailer, feeling more nervous than he had ever felt before and he wondered why this had ever seemed a good idea. Yet he ignored the predominant feeling of just running away and forgetting about the whole thing and softly knocked on the wooden door instead.
After an amount of time that had seemed ages to Viggo, the door was quietly opened and in front of him stood Sean, looking more beautiful than ever. His hair was tousled and a grin adorned his features, showing his perfect white teeth.
“Hey Vig, didn’t expect you,” Sean said in a light voice and smiled that beautiful smile that made Viggo want to turn in a puddle at his feet.
“I er… just wanted to see you,” Viggo blurted, then realised how stupid it sounded. But Sean’s only reaction was a widening of his smile and he gesticulated Viggo to come in.
Once inside the trailer, Viggo could feel himself getting more nervous with every second that passed. All these weeks he had managed to control himself, to behave as normally as possible around Sean, successfully hiding his feelings for the world, and now all his caution was shattered, gone along with his courage.
“You want some tea?” Sean asked kindly.
“Yeah, thanks,” Viggo said, scolding himself when he realised his voice was shaking. The fact that Sean looked at him with his head cocked to one side with a twinkle in his eye sure didn’t make it any better and Viggo quickly averted his eyes and sat down on the couch, pretending to be at ease.
“Something bothering you, old man?” Sean asked in a voice hinted with worry, his eyes still focussed on the man sitting on his couch.
“No, no… not at all, actually,” Viggo lied, casting a quick look at Sean to assure the younger man there was nothing wrong.
“Are you sure? You seem a bit… nervy,” Sean pressed with narrowed eyes.
Viggo sighed a frustrated sigh, feeling oddly exasperated by the way his friend seemed to see right through him. “Look, I’m fine, alright? Can we just drop the matter?” he snapped, regretting his words as soon as they were said.
Sean blinked and turned around to head for the kitchen and before he knew what he was doing, Viggo jumped up from the couch and grabbed Sean’s arm, turning him around.
“I’m sorry,” he apologised. “I didn’t mean it, I just…”
He couldn’t bring himself to look his friend, his love, in the eye and lowered his gaze instead. Sean brought his hand up to the right side of his face, forcing Viggo to look up at him. The older man had to do everything within his might to not lean in to Sean’s touch, to resist the urge to fall into his arms. Slowly, he looked up, right into eyes that were filled with sympathy and care. He was vaguely aware of the caressing movements Sean’s thumb made on his cheek and now that he was so close to this man, now that it would be so easy to give in, he could feel his insides turn to mush.
“It’s alright,” the soft voice of Sean sounded, the gentleness of it warming Viggo’s heart. “But why can’t you tell me what’s on your mind?”
“It’s… complicated,” Viggo murmured, averting Sean’s penetrating eyes again and stepping back, knowing he wouldn’t be able to fight back temptation if he would stand that close to the one his heart craved for any longer. He knew he had to say it, he knew that Sean wouldn’t let him leave before he had spilled the beans.
“Come on, let’s sit down, shall we?” Sean said, leading him to the couch, situating the older man next to him. He wasn’t aware of the jolts of love and longing his touch caused, neither of the struggling emotions Viggo was dealing with. He didn’t know anything about the overwhelming feeling of love and bottled up desire Viggo experienced and he could never have predicted Viggo’s next move.
Before he could control himself, before he let his mind wrap around the fact of what he was about to do, Viggo looked at Sean, let himself drown in the depths of those bright eyes and then dropped his gaze to those tempting pink lips, those lips that he had longing to feel against his for weeks.
He ever-so-quickly closed the distance between them and kissed Sean, kissed the man he was madly in love with. Softly, his lips glided against Sean’s, and he tasted even sweeter than Viggo had always imagined. All of a sudden, the magic of the moment was broken, broken by the abrupt way Sean backed away. When their eyes met, Viggo knew that he had made a mistake. He knew that he had crossed the line, that he had just done severe damage to the friendship they had established throughout the months.
Sean’s eyes were filled with astonishment, with shock and fright and disbelief and before he could utter a word, before he could speak the words Viggo had feared to hear above anything else, the older man had stood up from the couch and fled.
*
It was probably the most cowardly thing he had ever done, but Viggo simply hadn’t been able to stand the rejection. He had read it in Sean’s eyes, it had been there, clearly visible, and when he had seen it, Viggo had felt like his world came shattering down. He hadn’t given Sean the chance to utter his dismay, his disgust, perhaps, but his expression had told more than words ever could.
He couldn’t believe that he had kissed him, he simple couldn’t fathom how he could have ever done such a thing. Of course Sean had pulled back, of course he had been shocked and astounded and whatnot by Viggo’s unexpected and foolish attempt to show him what had been bothering him. He didn’t deny the fact that he had enjoyed the kiss, enjoyed the nearness of Sean’s body and the warmth that had radiated from him, but it had been wrong, a stupid mistake. If only he would have just thought before he had acted, if only he would have let his ratio speak for once, maybe then he wouldn’t feel as crushed, lonely and utterly silly as he did now.
Not only had Viggo lost the last stray of hope, he probably had also lost the best friend he could ever wish for. And over what? Over a foolish, stupid affection that went deeper than he should have allowed. He should have fought it, he should have made resistance, but instead he had permitted himself to get more and more attached to him, more and more drawn to the one he probably never dared to look in the eye again.
Viggo played with the idea of returning to his own trailer, but he reckoned that the small place would probably drive him insane. Instead, he went straight to the lake that was situated nearby, the place he always went to when he needed to reflect on things, when he needed to calm down. The tranquil and peaceful scenery he was greeted by made him come back to his senses almost immediately and he breathed the cool night air with closed eyes.
He wished Sean would have followed him, he wished he would appear behind him, wrap his arms around his waist and pull him close to him, telling him he was as much in love with Viggo as Viggo with him. Yet the only thing he felt was the wind, softly caressing him, embracing him almost consolingly. He wrapped his arms around himself and sank down to the ground that was still wet from the earlier shower of rain. Before he could even try to stop it, a single tear trickled over his cheek and he angrily wiped it away, not wanting to give in, wishing Sean’s rejection didn’t affect him so much.
And yet it did. No matter how hard he tried to convince himself that he would get over it, his instincts told him that he wouldn’t be able to get the broad-shouldered man out of his thoughts, his mind, his heart. The thought of having to face him again, having to face the one who had turned him down again, made Viggo cringe and the desperation he was flooded by was almost unbearable.
Maybe he should return to Sean’s trailer, maybe he should tell him that it had been a mistake, that he had been somehow caught up in the moment and that he regretted it with all his might. But the more he thought about it, the more stupid the whole idea sounded. Sean knew him probably better than he knew himself, and he would never fall for such a blatant lie. Besides, Viggo didn’t think he even had the guts to go back there.
After pulling himself together the best he could, Viggo stood up and wiped the dirt off his shirt. Slowly he walked towards his trailer, dreading the day that was about to come, because it would mean that he would see Sean again. He fumbled with his keys, then realised his door wasn’t even locked and stepped into the trailer. He was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn’t notice the dark figure sitting on his couch until he spoke.
“What was that about?” the figure that appeared to be Sean said in a calm voice.
Viggo startled and quickly turned around to face him, not for the first time that evening being at a complete loss for words when he saw the handsome man looking up at him with questioning eyes.
“Sean! What are you doing here?” he stammered, unconsciously backing away from the younger man, as if he wanted to protect himself from the accusations that would possibly leave Sean’s mouth.
“Your door was unlocked and seeing you were nowhere to be found, I figured I’d stay here until you would return. Which you now obviously have,” Sean said softly.
He didn’t seem to be angry or disgusted, in fact he was as calm and imperturbable as always. It was almost as though Viggo hadn’t just kissed him, as though nothing had changed. But something had changed, and Viggo knew it.
“I er… I went for a walk,” Viggo mumbled, still caught off guard by Sean’s unexpected presence and even more unexpected normal behaviour.
“I see.”
They both fell silent, Viggo searching for the right words which were very hard to find and Sean waiting for Viggo to say something.
“Look, I’m sorry for what happened in your trailer,” Viggo began, fidgeting with the sleeve of his shirt. “I didn’t mean to kiss you, it just… Well, it just happened. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean anything with it and it will certainly never happen again.”
There. He had said it. Alright, so maybe he hadn’t told the truth, but at least he had given an explanation. A rather unbelievable explanation, now that he repeated what he’d just said in his mind. In fact he had said the exact same thing that he hadn’t wanted to say. But it was too late now, there was no way he could take back his words. He dropped his gaze, wishing the earth would swallow him right there and then, suddenly very aware of the silence that hung in the air. If he would have looked at Sean then, he would have seen infinite tenderness and care, together with the tiniest hint of amusement. But Viggo kept on looking at the floor, unaware of the fact that Sean was biting his cheek to keep himself from laughing.
“Oh Vig,” Sean suddenly laughed, a joyous, honest laugh that made Viggo look up in amazement. “You’re the worst liar I have ever seen.”
Viggo was completely taken aback by Sean’s sudden outburst and he couldn’t figure out whether he was being laughed at or not. But at least he still sounded like Sean, rather than someone who didn’t want to have to do anything with him anymore. Viggo smiled a shy smile, feeling uneasy and uncertain, a feeling that grew stronger with every chuckle Sean let out.
“I take it that you’re not angry with me?” he said, feeling far too vulnerable for his liking.
Sean’s laughter faded and he stood up from the couch, slowly making his way over to a very uncomfortable Viggo who couldn’t bring himself to look at him. Sean put his hands on Viggo’s shoulders and lowered his head to make eye-contact. The gentleness Viggo met in those deep pools of crystal blue made his knees go weak and for the first time he felt that maybe, just maybe, there was a chance Sean had enjoyed their kiss as much as Viggo had.
“How could I be angry?” Sean whispered softly, his warm breath tickling Viggo’s skin. “How could I be angry with someone as beautiful and amazing as you?”
Viggo thought he was going to die. In fact he knew for certain he was going to die. How could he not, now that Sean was so dangerously close to him, looking at him with the sweetest of all looks and sending all coherent thoughts on vacation by the way his thumbs caressed his neck?
“But you-” Viggo protested, unable to believe what he thought Sean was about to say or do.
“I know,” Sean said, dropping his arms so that his hands encircled Viggo’s waist. He ever-so-softly pulled the other man closer to him, never breaking the eye-contact. “I was just… surprised. Pleasantly surprised, I might add. But you ran away before I could even make that clear.”
He softly chuckled and despite himself, Viggo heard himself chuckle as well, although it sounded more nervous than he’d intended. “I’m sorry, I just thought that you were-”
“Shh,” Sean hushes, interrupting his stammering. “No more apologising. And no, I wasn’t whatever you were going to say. I’m in love with you, Vig.”
Viggo’s heard jerked up at the words and he swore that his heart literally stopped for a few moments. He was in love with him. Sean was in love with him, Viggo. All these weeks. All these weeks and he had never truly believed that his feelings would be returned, that Sean could actually love him. And now he had told him he did. Viggo wondered if his knees would ever stop buckling, if his heart would ever beat in a normal pace again, if the butterflies that were madly flying around in his stomach would ever disappear, and more important, if he could finally kiss Sean now, kiss Sean for real this time.
“And I with you,” he whispered in a hoarse voice.
Sean’s face lit up at the words, although he must have known already, and the last thing Viggo saw before he closed his eyes and surrendered, was the love Sean’s eyes shimmered with.
He melted into Sean’s touch, Sean’s embrace, and he finally gave in to the desire that had been building up inside him for so long. Their lips met and after shyly yet determinedly discovering what it felt like, what Sean felt like underneath his longing mouth, Viggo couldn’t hold himself any longer. He nibbled Sean’s lower lip, savouring the little noises in the back of the younger man’s throat, enjoying the feeling of finally being in the arms of the one he loved. He ever-so-carefully ran his tongue along the sensitive, swollen lips of the other man, and got the entrance he was seeking for almost immediately. When he could feel the tip of Sean’s tongue against his own, Viggo could swear that the bones in his body had turned into liquid. He didn’t think he could ever get enough of it, of Sean’s eager tongue that made his head spin and his toes curl.
Why did it take him so long? Why did it take him so long to realise that Sean was all that he really needed, all that his heart really longed for? Whatever it was, Viggo was glad, more than glad, that his eyes eventually had been opened. Because now that he held Sean in his arms, he knew that he was really everything he ever needed.
*
Viggo mused.
Viggo mused and pondered and thought, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t remember feeling more happy than he did now. He and Sean had been inseparable ever since that night in his trailer and he could feel the love between them grow with every day that passed. Sean’s smile still could make his insides melt, his touch never failed to sent him into the highest heavens and his eyes had never lost that loving gleam.
He had found him. He had found that one person he was meant to be with and he was determined to never let him go again.
I'm kinda new here, but if I had known that this community existed, I would have joined it ages ago already! I honestly thought that there weren't a lot of Vig/Sean-lovers around, but I'm glad to see that I was wrong!
Anyway, today I wrote my first slash-fic, and seeing that it's about our lovely men, I just had to post it here.
Title:Drawn
Author: AutumnSparkle
Disclaimer: As far as I know, Viggo never fell for Sean, the daft cow :P This is just my imagination...
Rating: PG13
Pairing: Viggo/Sean B
Summary: Viggo is desperately in love with his best friend... and I suck at summaries.
Feedback: Very much appreciated.
Note: This isn't checked by a BR unfortunately, so try to ignore any mistakes. Oh, and it's quite fluffy as well. If anyone would like to check it, I'd be very happy.
Warnings: This is slash, so if male/male relationships aren't your cup of tea, just don't read it!
Viggo mused.
Viggo mused and pondered and thought and the more he did so, the more he came to the conclusion that it probably was just temporary. Soon he would wake up and discover that it had all been just a phase, a silly crush, nothing to worry about. He would shrug it off, maybe laugh about it, laugh about the memory of not being able to concentrate on whatever he was doing and just get on with his life.
Except that he knew that it was more. More than a ‘silly crush’, more than just a temporary hormonal issue, oh, endlessly more. He never intended to fall for his best friend, never intended to fall for those icy blue eyes, that deep, soft voice or that beautiful, honest smile. And yet he had. He had fallen, hard and fast and deep, and he knew there was no turning back.
It had been a long time since he had been that captivated by someone, that mesmerised by every single word, every single touch and every single movement. It had been even a longer time since he had been in love with a guy. In fact he couldn’t even remember ever having fallen in love with a guy. There was just something about him, there was just something about Sean that had caught his attention and that had intrigued him, yet he couldn’t quite figure out what it was.
The only thing he knew was that if he didn’t do anything about it soon, he would probably go mad. Yet the mere thought of letting Sean know that he was the object of his unexpected affections scared him beyond belief, and the risk of ruining their friendship that was so precious to the both of them only added to his doubts.
So Viggo mused some more.
He imagined how Sean would react if he would tell him, what Sean would say or do, but none of the imagined reactions were encouraging. As far as he could tell, Sean still was as straight as always, so chances were slim that his feelings would be returned. And yet, there was a tiny sparkle of hope, a little voice in the back of his head that told him he had to go for it, see where it would lead to. If their friendship was as strong as he believed it was, Sean wouldn't abandon it because of what he felt, wouldn’t abandon him because of what he felt. And if the most unlikely of things would happen, if Sean would let him know that he had been struggling with the same thoughts and feelings, he knew he could die a happy death.
Being an artist, Viggo was used to do what his instincts told him, rather than let his mind overrule his heart, but this time it took him considerably longer to take the decision of indeed following his heart, to tell Sean what had been bothering him for weeks now.
And here he was, standing in front of Sean’s trailer, feeling more nervous than he had ever felt before and he wondered why this had ever seemed a good idea. Yet he ignored the predominant feeling of just running away and forgetting about the whole thing and softly knocked on the wooden door instead.
After an amount of time that had seemed ages to Viggo, the door was quietly opened and in front of him stood Sean, looking more beautiful than ever. His hair was tousled and a grin adorned his features, showing his perfect white teeth.
“Hey Vig, didn’t expect you,” Sean said in a light voice and smiled that beautiful smile that made Viggo want to turn in a puddle at his feet.
“I er… just wanted to see you,” Viggo blurted, then realised how stupid it sounded. But Sean’s only reaction was a widening of his smile and he gesticulated Viggo to come in.
Once inside the trailer, Viggo could feel himself getting more nervous with every second that passed. All these weeks he had managed to control himself, to behave as normally as possible around Sean, successfully hiding his feelings for the world, and now all his caution was shattered, gone along with his courage.
“You want some tea?” Sean asked kindly.
“Yeah, thanks,” Viggo said, scolding himself when he realised his voice was shaking. The fact that Sean looked at him with his head cocked to one side with a twinkle in his eye sure didn’t make it any better and Viggo quickly averted his eyes and sat down on the couch, pretending to be at ease.
“Something bothering you, old man?” Sean asked in a voice hinted with worry, his eyes still focussed on the man sitting on his couch.
“No, no… not at all, actually,” Viggo lied, casting a quick look at Sean to assure the younger man there was nothing wrong.
“Are you sure? You seem a bit… nervy,” Sean pressed with narrowed eyes.
Viggo sighed a frustrated sigh, feeling oddly exasperated by the way his friend seemed to see right through him. “Look, I’m fine, alright? Can we just drop the matter?” he snapped, regretting his words as soon as they were said.
Sean blinked and turned around to head for the kitchen and before he knew what he was doing, Viggo jumped up from the couch and grabbed Sean’s arm, turning him around.
“I’m sorry,” he apologised. “I didn’t mean it, I just…”
He couldn’t bring himself to look his friend, his love, in the eye and lowered his gaze instead. Sean brought his hand up to the right side of his face, forcing Viggo to look up at him. The older man had to do everything within his might to not lean in to Sean’s touch, to resist the urge to fall into his arms. Slowly, he looked up, right into eyes that were filled with sympathy and care. He was vaguely aware of the caressing movements Sean’s thumb made on his cheek and now that he was so close to this man, now that it would be so easy to give in, he could feel his insides turn to mush.
“It’s alright,” the soft voice of Sean sounded, the gentleness of it warming Viggo’s heart. “But why can’t you tell me what’s on your mind?”
“It’s… complicated,” Viggo murmured, averting Sean’s penetrating eyes again and stepping back, knowing he wouldn’t be able to fight back temptation if he would stand that close to the one his heart craved for any longer. He knew he had to say it, he knew that Sean wouldn’t let him leave before he had spilled the beans.
“Come on, let’s sit down, shall we?” Sean said, leading him to the couch, situating the older man next to him. He wasn’t aware of the jolts of love and longing his touch caused, neither of the struggling emotions Viggo was dealing with. He didn’t know anything about the overwhelming feeling of love and bottled up desire Viggo experienced and he could never have predicted Viggo’s next move.
Before he could control himself, before he let his mind wrap around the fact of what he was about to do, Viggo looked at Sean, let himself drown in the depths of those bright eyes and then dropped his gaze to those tempting pink lips, those lips that he had longing to feel against his for weeks.
He ever-so-quickly closed the distance between them and kissed Sean, kissed the man he was madly in love with. Softly, his lips glided against Sean’s, and he tasted even sweeter than Viggo had always imagined. All of a sudden, the magic of the moment was broken, broken by the abrupt way Sean backed away. When their eyes met, Viggo knew that he had made a mistake. He knew that he had crossed the line, that he had just done severe damage to the friendship they had established throughout the months.
Sean’s eyes were filled with astonishment, with shock and fright and disbelief and before he could utter a word, before he could speak the words Viggo had feared to hear above anything else, the older man had stood up from the couch and fled.
*
It was probably the most cowardly thing he had ever done, but Viggo simply hadn’t been able to stand the rejection. He had read it in Sean’s eyes, it had been there, clearly visible, and when he had seen it, Viggo had felt like his world came shattering down. He hadn’t given Sean the chance to utter his dismay, his disgust, perhaps, but his expression had told more than words ever could.
He couldn’t believe that he had kissed him, he simple couldn’t fathom how he could have ever done such a thing. Of course Sean had pulled back, of course he had been shocked and astounded and whatnot by Viggo’s unexpected and foolish attempt to show him what had been bothering him. He didn’t deny the fact that he had enjoyed the kiss, enjoyed the nearness of Sean’s body and the warmth that had radiated from him, but it had been wrong, a stupid mistake. If only he would have just thought before he had acted, if only he would have let his ratio speak for once, maybe then he wouldn’t feel as crushed, lonely and utterly silly as he did now.
Not only had Viggo lost the last stray of hope, he probably had also lost the best friend he could ever wish for. And over what? Over a foolish, stupid affection that went deeper than he should have allowed. He should have fought it, he should have made resistance, but instead he had permitted himself to get more and more attached to him, more and more drawn to the one he probably never dared to look in the eye again.
Viggo played with the idea of returning to his own trailer, but he reckoned that the small place would probably drive him insane. Instead, he went straight to the lake that was situated nearby, the place he always went to when he needed to reflect on things, when he needed to calm down. The tranquil and peaceful scenery he was greeted by made him come back to his senses almost immediately and he breathed the cool night air with closed eyes.
He wished Sean would have followed him, he wished he would appear behind him, wrap his arms around his waist and pull him close to him, telling him he was as much in love with Viggo as Viggo with him. Yet the only thing he felt was the wind, softly caressing him, embracing him almost consolingly. He wrapped his arms around himself and sank down to the ground that was still wet from the earlier shower of rain. Before he could even try to stop it, a single tear trickled over his cheek and he angrily wiped it away, not wanting to give in, wishing Sean’s rejection didn’t affect him so much.
And yet it did. No matter how hard he tried to convince himself that he would get over it, his instincts told him that he wouldn’t be able to get the broad-shouldered man out of his thoughts, his mind, his heart. The thought of having to face him again, having to face the one who had turned him down again, made Viggo cringe and the desperation he was flooded by was almost unbearable.
Maybe he should return to Sean’s trailer, maybe he should tell him that it had been a mistake, that he had been somehow caught up in the moment and that he regretted it with all his might. But the more he thought about it, the more stupid the whole idea sounded. Sean knew him probably better than he knew himself, and he would never fall for such a blatant lie. Besides, Viggo didn’t think he even had the guts to go back there.
After pulling himself together the best he could, Viggo stood up and wiped the dirt off his shirt. Slowly he walked towards his trailer, dreading the day that was about to come, because it would mean that he would see Sean again. He fumbled with his keys, then realised his door wasn’t even locked and stepped into the trailer. He was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn’t notice the dark figure sitting on his couch until he spoke.
“What was that about?” the figure that appeared to be Sean said in a calm voice.
Viggo startled and quickly turned around to face him, not for the first time that evening being at a complete loss for words when he saw the handsome man looking up at him with questioning eyes.
“Sean! What are you doing here?” he stammered, unconsciously backing away from the younger man, as if he wanted to protect himself from the accusations that would possibly leave Sean’s mouth.
“Your door was unlocked and seeing you were nowhere to be found, I figured I’d stay here until you would return. Which you now obviously have,” Sean said softly.
He didn’t seem to be angry or disgusted, in fact he was as calm and imperturbable as always. It was almost as though Viggo hadn’t just kissed him, as though nothing had changed. But something had changed, and Viggo knew it.
“I er… I went for a walk,” Viggo mumbled, still caught off guard by Sean’s unexpected presence and even more unexpected normal behaviour.
“I see.”
They both fell silent, Viggo searching for the right words which were very hard to find and Sean waiting for Viggo to say something.
“Look, I’m sorry for what happened in your trailer,” Viggo began, fidgeting with the sleeve of his shirt. “I didn’t mean to kiss you, it just… Well, it just happened. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean anything with it and it will certainly never happen again.”
There. He had said it. Alright, so maybe he hadn’t told the truth, but at least he had given an explanation. A rather unbelievable explanation, now that he repeated what he’d just said in his mind. In fact he had said the exact same thing that he hadn’t wanted to say. But it was too late now, there was no way he could take back his words. He dropped his gaze, wishing the earth would swallow him right there and then, suddenly very aware of the silence that hung in the air. If he would have looked at Sean then, he would have seen infinite tenderness and care, together with the tiniest hint of amusement. But Viggo kept on looking at the floor, unaware of the fact that Sean was biting his cheek to keep himself from laughing.
“Oh Vig,” Sean suddenly laughed, a joyous, honest laugh that made Viggo look up in amazement. “You’re the worst liar I have ever seen.”
Viggo was completely taken aback by Sean’s sudden outburst and he couldn’t figure out whether he was being laughed at or not. But at least he still sounded like Sean, rather than someone who didn’t want to have to do anything with him anymore. Viggo smiled a shy smile, feeling uneasy and uncertain, a feeling that grew stronger with every chuckle Sean let out.
“I take it that you’re not angry with me?” he said, feeling far too vulnerable for his liking.
Sean’s laughter faded and he stood up from the couch, slowly making his way over to a very uncomfortable Viggo who couldn’t bring himself to look at him. Sean put his hands on Viggo’s shoulders and lowered his head to make eye-contact. The gentleness Viggo met in those deep pools of crystal blue made his knees go weak and for the first time he felt that maybe, just maybe, there was a chance Sean had enjoyed their kiss as much as Viggo had.
“How could I be angry?” Sean whispered softly, his warm breath tickling Viggo’s skin. “How could I be angry with someone as beautiful and amazing as you?”
Viggo thought he was going to die. In fact he knew for certain he was going to die. How could he not, now that Sean was so dangerously close to him, looking at him with the sweetest of all looks and sending all coherent thoughts on vacation by the way his thumbs caressed his neck?
“But you-” Viggo protested, unable to believe what he thought Sean was about to say or do.
“I know,” Sean said, dropping his arms so that his hands encircled Viggo’s waist. He ever-so-softly pulled the other man closer to him, never breaking the eye-contact. “I was just… surprised. Pleasantly surprised, I might add. But you ran away before I could even make that clear.”
He softly chuckled and despite himself, Viggo heard himself chuckle as well, although it sounded more nervous than he’d intended. “I’m sorry, I just thought that you were-”
“Shh,” Sean hushes, interrupting his stammering. “No more apologising. And no, I wasn’t whatever you were going to say. I’m in love with you, Vig.”
Viggo’s heard jerked up at the words and he swore that his heart literally stopped for a few moments. He was in love with him. Sean was in love with him, Viggo. All these weeks. All these weeks and he had never truly believed that his feelings would be returned, that Sean could actually love him. And now he had told him he did. Viggo wondered if his knees would ever stop buckling, if his heart would ever beat in a normal pace again, if the butterflies that were madly flying around in his stomach would ever disappear, and more important, if he could finally kiss Sean now, kiss Sean for real this time.
“And I with you,” he whispered in a hoarse voice.
Sean’s face lit up at the words, although he must have known already, and the last thing Viggo saw before he closed his eyes and surrendered, was the love Sean’s eyes shimmered with.
He melted into Sean’s touch, Sean’s embrace, and he finally gave in to the desire that had been building up inside him for so long. Their lips met and after shyly yet determinedly discovering what it felt like, what Sean felt like underneath his longing mouth, Viggo couldn’t hold himself any longer. He nibbled Sean’s lower lip, savouring the little noises in the back of the younger man’s throat, enjoying the feeling of finally being in the arms of the one he loved. He ever-so-carefully ran his tongue along the sensitive, swollen lips of the other man, and got the entrance he was seeking for almost immediately. When he could feel the tip of Sean’s tongue against his own, Viggo could swear that the bones in his body had turned into liquid. He didn’t think he could ever get enough of it, of Sean’s eager tongue that made his head spin and his toes curl.
Why did it take him so long? Why did it take him so long to realise that Sean was all that he really needed, all that his heart really longed for? Whatever it was, Viggo was glad, more than glad, that his eyes eventually had been opened. Because now that he held Sean in his arms, he knew that he was really everything he ever needed.
*
Viggo mused.
Viggo mused and pondered and thought, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t remember feeling more happy than he did now. He and Sean had been inseparable ever since that night in his trailer and he could feel the love between them grow with every day that passed. Sean’s smile still could make his insides melt, his touch never failed to sent him into the highest heavens and his eyes had never lost that loving gleam.
He had found him. He had found that one person he was meant to be with and he was determined to never let him go again.
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Date: 2003-08-26 06:04 pm (UTC)Anyway, I really enjoyed your fic and really hope to see more from you.
Just a quick note...
never intended to fall for those icy blue eyes
If you were talking about Sean, I am pretty sure his eyes are green, though you may want to check rather than take my word on it. (The only reason I even (think) I know is that one of my fav Bean!slash archives is called Green Opals).
Anyway, *waves* just wanted to say hello and it is great to have you around...
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Date: 2003-08-26 06:06 pm (UTC)Thanks for mentioning and welcoming me :) It's good to be here and be able to read so much gorgeous VS-fics.. *swoons*
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Date: 2003-08-26 07:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-08-26 07:54 pm (UTC)And yes, I'd be very glad if you'd want to check my stories!
Thank you! 8)
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Date: 2003-08-26 09:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-08-26 09:52 pm (UTC)You're a doll!
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Date: 2003-08-27 11:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-08-26 10:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-08-27 11:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-08-28 12:42 am (UTC)