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rugbytackleTitle: The Sharing of Dreams
Author: Rocketbalm
Pairing: SB/VM
Rating: PG 13
Summary: Getting reacquainted and fitting into each others life.
Content/warnings: none
Spoilers: None.
Disclaimer: A work of my modestly twisted mind -- complete fiction. Never happened. Don’t know these people, sadly all in my imagination.
Chapter 5a – Redefining Home
Viggo couldn’t sleep if he wanted too. Professionally, the fates had dealt him a hand of life time; that is if he could pull it off. As for personally, he still wasn’t sure what the fates were handing him; or more accurately what he wanted them to hand him. Three days ago he was trying to decide which paintings he would be showing at his latest gallery opening and now, here he was, on a plane hurtling headlong into an unknown future.
The flight which should have felt like an eternity seemed not long enough to sort out the clutter in his mind. In between trying to read Henry’s dog-eared copy of the Lord of the Rings and figuring out the heart of his character he also searched his soul for what about Sean was real and what he merely dreamed to be real in the two years since he last saw the Brit. Thoughts ricocheted inside his skull, bouncing off one another, feeding off each other. Personal and professional blended into one. Could he pull of this complex character with so little preparation? Would Sean feel he was intruding? Could he do justice to all the intricacies of this magnificent story? Would he be able to sort out his feelings for Sean? Would they be able to work together? Would their friendship survive? Two hours out of Auckland his exhaustion finally shut down his conscious thought and let him sleep.
He staggered off the plane and in a daze waded through customs and wandered out into the terminal expecting a production assistant to meet him. He stood, barefoot; shoulders slumped and tried to focus on the blur of people around him.
An arm snake around his shoulders, startling him as it pulled him close. “Looking for someone, Mate?”, rumbled the rich warm accent he’d missed so much. Viggo turned and burrowed his tired body into the hug. Without thinking he nuzzled his face into the crook of Sean’s neck, and breathed in his scent and let his body be warmed by his touch. Sean’s low chuckle slowly vibrated from deep in his chest, “You’re knackered mate. Come on, let’s get you home”.
Viggo didn’t know what Sean meant by home, he just knew it sounded good and he let himself be guided out of the airport to the waiting car. There, leaning restlessly against the car was one of the most beautiful men, not more than a boy really, Viggo had ever seen.
“Ah, there’s the Elf”, gestured Sean. Viggo looked over at Sean, completely confused, which brought forth yet another chuckle from Sean that touched Viggo to his core.
“Hobbits wanted ta come too, but I put my foot down at that.” He said smiling “At least Orli’s house broken, you never can tell with the furry footed little buggers.”
Elf? Hobbits? Slowly Viggo let world of middle earth intrude into the contentment of just being with Sean again and with a grin he held out his hand to the Elf. Before his brain could register movement he was hauled into a wriggling, enthusiastic hug.
“God Sean, you’re right, he does have the air of a King, exactly as Aragorn should.” With an exuberance that could only come from Orlando. A tingle went up Viggo’s spine; Sean thought he fit the part of a King. God he had to be tired to read anything into that. Christ, thought Viggo, get it together.
“Viggo, this is Orlando Bloom, fellow Brit, extreme sports enthusiast and your Princling Elf, Legolas. Orlando, may I present the future King of Gondor.” Sean said with a flourish.
Viggo gave the young man a warm smile, “Hi Orlando, glad to meet you. If you ignore Sean and drop the future King shit, we’ll get along just fine.”
Orland grinned “I’m sure I’ll be able to come up with something far less flattering as I get to know you better. After all, you’re a mere mortal, a filthy human if you will.” His eyes twinkled mischievously.
With a tired smile, Viggo felt an instant kinship with this bright, enchanting young man and let himself be gently guided to the back seat of the car, with Sean following close behind. They hadn’t got far before Viggo realized that Orli’s driving was as manic as his energy and his rapid fire speech. Viggo tried to keep up with all the information that he was being flooded with but soon, his eyes began to flutter shut.
He felt Sean’s arm around him pulling him close and whispering in his hair, “Sleep friend, I’m glad you’re here.” Orli glanced back in the rearview mirror, amused at the tender sight he saw. Sean glared at him and whispered “not a word, Elf, not a word”.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
The next few weeks were a whirlwind as Viggo worked hard to catch up, get settled in, figure how and where he fit in. He rarely saw Sean those first few weeks even though they lived minutes apart. It was hardest job he ever had and the most fun. Everyone was amazingly talented, interesting, and fully engrossed in PJ’s vision of the epic films. When they did run into each other on the set they dissolved in fits of laughter or were lost in quiet observation. The naturalness of their friendship was soon re-established and grew as they worked and played together. Likewise, the bond between the nine members of the fellowship was effortless. Within that smaller group of nine, everyone accepted that the connection between Sean and Viggo was stronger still and that it kept them slightly apart.
Orlando had caught the underlying emotions that ran through the bond and was fascinated by its dynamic. He knew that the dance that Viggo and Sean were engaged in was far more emotionally charged than either of them recognized. Instinctively, Orli was aware that his own strength and compassion for both men would be needed if ever that dance ended and soon watching the two friends became second nature.
By the second month the two men had settled into a regular routine -- at the end of the day, Sean would usually wait for Viggo outside the trailer, reading the paper or letters from his girls, while Viggo let go of being Aragorn for the day. Together they would either keep a leash on the elf and the hobbits or have dinner on their own and share a beer or two. Whether they were talking about everything and nothing or sitting for hours in comfortable silence – Sean reading or cooking and Viggo sketching or writing – the closeness strengthened and grew. Though they talked about most things, Sean rarely mentioned the divorce he was going through. Viggo could tell by the set of his jaw and flashes of pain in his eyes whether the call or letter the Brit was dealing with had to do with Abby and the divorce. While Viggo carefully avoided asking Sean about what happened in his marriage, he knew that Sean would talk to him when he was ready. After a few drinks he would often see Sean struggle between wanting to talk about it and wanting, needing to deal with it on his own. Viggo knew that the struggle was part of the healing that Sean sought and Sean needed to find his own lessons from the experience. Having walked down the same road, allowed Viggo to give Sean the freedom to grow while letting him know he fully supported him through the process. Sean was grateful for the space and tried to sort out everything he was feeling. The trust and mutual respect for each other matured as much from things left unsaid as from those they shared.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Chapter 5b – Rituals
At the end of another busy week, Sean lay back on the couch waiting for Viggo. Finally there was a Blades game on the telly and they were going to have dinner and few beers while they watched. Tired tonight, thought Sean as he closed his eyes. Trying to keep his all the thoughts and feelings echoing in his brain to a dull roar was pointless. Eventually everything came flooding back. His divorce, relationships, friendships, everything.
How do I end up in the same place time and time again? Thought Sean. God it hurt. Abby accused him of not knowing what his priorities were or what he wanted… Did he even know what he wanted? Sean suddenly felt overwhelmed. At least he had Viggo. Viggo had a way of turning any day around. Sean smiled as he thought about his friend. Daft bugger could make every sunset an event or eating dinner a five sense extravaganza. Amazing things happened with Viggo, the ordinary became extra-ordinary. Then, when you were completely relaxed and cloaked in gentle warmth that surrounded Viggo, he would convey a simple thought or idea. Something seemingly random, that later, on reflection would reveal itself; a gift, given without expectation or guile. Always relevant without making you feel thick or imposed upon. How Viggo always knew what Sean needed – even before Sean did – was at times unsettling but never unwelcome -- it gave Sean great reassurance, he wasn’t alone.
Flashback
”Does dying ever bother you Sean?”
“You mean thinking about dying or having my characters killed all the time?
“The characters. Ever find it hard to let them go?”
“Nah, you know I’m not like you. I just step in and out of their skin for the camera and then move on. Boromir might be a little harder to say good-bye to. Maybe it will just be hard because I’ll be gone and everyone will still be here, carrying on and eventually forgetting me – more like dying, really. It will probably be hard for a while, you know.”
“Yeah, I do. It always amazes me that western culture puts so much emphasis on beginnings and pays so little attention to endings”
“You’re losing me here, Vig”
“Well, let’s see. We have ceremonies or rituals for weddings, christenings, Bar mitzvahs -- all these beginnings. We have very little for endings.”
“We have funerals”
‘Yeah funerals because that final, but what about for other endings. We spend months and in some cases years planning a wedding, a celebration, ceremony, ritual what have you… If that union ends, there is no ritual or ceremony to add closure to that. There’s just lawyers’ pitting both sides against each other.”
“Won’t get an argument out me on that one”
“Don’t you find that odd? In other cultures they honour endings with a ritual or a ceremony. Failures are only failures if you fail to learn. A closing ritual or ceremony honours the lesson and promotes healing. It’s amazingly cleansing”
“Not sure I know what you mean. Honouring failure? Something I’m good at but I’m not sure I want to honour it.”
“Not honouring the failure, acknowledging the lesson – big difference.”
“Losing me again, Vig”
“Okay, how’s this. When Exene and I finally decided to split there were several months of really hurtful behaviour on both our parts. Sometimes, in all the anger you forget that you must have cared, even loved each other at one point. I mean come on, pick any of your exes, I bet you can think of at least one amazing thing that you shared, including but not limited to your children. There must have been something good there right?”
“Sometimes hard to believe but yeah, I would agree with that.”
“Well I felt like I was drowning in anger and resentment and I didn’t like that. What I really wanted was a way to release all of the bitterness wrapped up in the divorce. I went in search of a way to do that. I looked at our own culture and found very little, but other cultures and religions are rich with rituals to honour endings and promote spiritual growth. Ultimately, balance is achieved by honoring your spiritual path and spiritual learning.
“…and you actually did this. Found something, some ‘ritual’ and … what? Danced naked in the rain or some such thing and it made you feel better or what?”
“No, not naked in the rain, though I like your thinking. No the ritual I found is quite beautiful in its simplicity, actually.”
“Go on”
“You just humouring me or do you really want to know?”
“Little of both I guess”
“Fair enough. You start by taking three pieces of paper. You write down your truth as it relates to each of the following; the positive aspects of the relationship, the negative aspects of the relationship and the dream you held of what you wanted the relationship to be. Then you light a fire, burn a candle whatever, something with a flame.”
“Okay so I was wrong about the rain thing but I knew there had to be fire. Any ritual worth its salt has fire.”
“I’m sharing here, Sean”
“Sorry Vig, I know I’m being an arse. All this touchy feely stuff makes me squirm. Really, I’m interested. Truly… go on.”
“Getting back to the fire… You start with the first page and say I’m releasing everything negative in this relationship and read what you wrote and then burn it. You do each of the three and let everything go, releasing everything back to the universe. Sounds simple but it’s really quite amazing.”
“I’d probably end up burning the house down and have the insurance refuse to pay. Maybe if you added chocolate and made some of those s’mores you’re so fond of to the ritual it would catch on…”
End of Flashback
It wasn’t until days later that Sean realized how big an arse he truly was. When Viggo shared things about himself, it was always well thought out and never random. While it wasn’t a chance conversation, the insight was offered without expectations. Sean’s acute embarrassment kept him from exploring the advice further – instead he tucked it away knowing one day he’d go back and further examine the gift Viggo given him.
TBC – contact next chapter I promise, angsty contact, but contact.
Author: Rocketbalm
Pairing: SB/VM
Rating: PG 13
Summary: Getting reacquainted and fitting into each others life.
Content/warnings: none
Spoilers: None.
Disclaimer: A work of my modestly twisted mind -- complete fiction. Never happened. Don’t know these people, sadly all in my imagination.
Chapter 5a – Redefining Home
Viggo couldn’t sleep if he wanted too. Professionally, the fates had dealt him a hand of life time; that is if he could pull it off. As for personally, he still wasn’t sure what the fates were handing him; or more accurately what he wanted them to hand him. Three days ago he was trying to decide which paintings he would be showing at his latest gallery opening and now, here he was, on a plane hurtling headlong into an unknown future.
The flight which should have felt like an eternity seemed not long enough to sort out the clutter in his mind. In between trying to read Henry’s dog-eared copy of the Lord of the Rings and figuring out the heart of his character he also searched his soul for what about Sean was real and what he merely dreamed to be real in the two years since he last saw the Brit. Thoughts ricocheted inside his skull, bouncing off one another, feeding off each other. Personal and professional blended into one. Could he pull of this complex character with so little preparation? Would Sean feel he was intruding? Could he do justice to all the intricacies of this magnificent story? Would he be able to sort out his feelings for Sean? Would they be able to work together? Would their friendship survive? Two hours out of Auckland his exhaustion finally shut down his conscious thought and let him sleep.
He staggered off the plane and in a daze waded through customs and wandered out into the terminal expecting a production assistant to meet him. He stood, barefoot; shoulders slumped and tried to focus on the blur of people around him.
An arm snake around his shoulders, startling him as it pulled him close. “Looking for someone, Mate?”, rumbled the rich warm accent he’d missed so much. Viggo turned and burrowed his tired body into the hug. Without thinking he nuzzled his face into the crook of Sean’s neck, and breathed in his scent and let his body be warmed by his touch. Sean’s low chuckle slowly vibrated from deep in his chest, “You’re knackered mate. Come on, let’s get you home”.
Viggo didn’t know what Sean meant by home, he just knew it sounded good and he let himself be guided out of the airport to the waiting car. There, leaning restlessly against the car was one of the most beautiful men, not more than a boy really, Viggo had ever seen.
“Ah, there’s the Elf”, gestured Sean. Viggo looked over at Sean, completely confused, which brought forth yet another chuckle from Sean that touched Viggo to his core.
“Hobbits wanted ta come too, but I put my foot down at that.” He said smiling “At least Orli’s house broken, you never can tell with the furry footed little buggers.”
Elf? Hobbits? Slowly Viggo let world of middle earth intrude into the contentment of just being with Sean again and with a grin he held out his hand to the Elf. Before his brain could register movement he was hauled into a wriggling, enthusiastic hug.
“God Sean, you’re right, he does have the air of a King, exactly as Aragorn should.” With an exuberance that could only come from Orlando. A tingle went up Viggo’s spine; Sean thought he fit the part of a King. God he had to be tired to read anything into that. Christ, thought Viggo, get it together.
“Viggo, this is Orlando Bloom, fellow Brit, extreme sports enthusiast and your Princling Elf, Legolas. Orlando, may I present the future King of Gondor.” Sean said with a flourish.
Viggo gave the young man a warm smile, “Hi Orlando, glad to meet you. If you ignore Sean and drop the future King shit, we’ll get along just fine.”
Orland grinned “I’m sure I’ll be able to come up with something far less flattering as I get to know you better. After all, you’re a mere mortal, a filthy human if you will.” His eyes twinkled mischievously.
With a tired smile, Viggo felt an instant kinship with this bright, enchanting young man and let himself be gently guided to the back seat of the car, with Sean following close behind. They hadn’t got far before Viggo realized that Orli’s driving was as manic as his energy and his rapid fire speech. Viggo tried to keep up with all the information that he was being flooded with but soon, his eyes began to flutter shut.
He felt Sean’s arm around him pulling him close and whispering in his hair, “Sleep friend, I’m glad you’re here.” Orli glanced back in the rearview mirror, amused at the tender sight he saw. Sean glared at him and whispered “not a word, Elf, not a word”.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
The next few weeks were a whirlwind as Viggo worked hard to catch up, get settled in, figure how and where he fit in. He rarely saw Sean those first few weeks even though they lived minutes apart. It was hardest job he ever had and the most fun. Everyone was amazingly talented, interesting, and fully engrossed in PJ’s vision of the epic films. When they did run into each other on the set they dissolved in fits of laughter or were lost in quiet observation. The naturalness of their friendship was soon re-established and grew as they worked and played together. Likewise, the bond between the nine members of the fellowship was effortless. Within that smaller group of nine, everyone accepted that the connection between Sean and Viggo was stronger still and that it kept them slightly apart.
Orlando had caught the underlying emotions that ran through the bond and was fascinated by its dynamic. He knew that the dance that Viggo and Sean were engaged in was far more emotionally charged than either of them recognized. Instinctively, Orli was aware that his own strength and compassion for both men would be needed if ever that dance ended and soon watching the two friends became second nature.
By the second month the two men had settled into a regular routine -- at the end of the day, Sean would usually wait for Viggo outside the trailer, reading the paper or letters from his girls, while Viggo let go of being Aragorn for the day. Together they would either keep a leash on the elf and the hobbits or have dinner on their own and share a beer or two. Whether they were talking about everything and nothing or sitting for hours in comfortable silence – Sean reading or cooking and Viggo sketching or writing – the closeness strengthened and grew. Though they talked about most things, Sean rarely mentioned the divorce he was going through. Viggo could tell by the set of his jaw and flashes of pain in his eyes whether the call or letter the Brit was dealing with had to do with Abby and the divorce. While Viggo carefully avoided asking Sean about what happened in his marriage, he knew that Sean would talk to him when he was ready. After a few drinks he would often see Sean struggle between wanting to talk about it and wanting, needing to deal with it on his own. Viggo knew that the struggle was part of the healing that Sean sought and Sean needed to find his own lessons from the experience. Having walked down the same road, allowed Viggo to give Sean the freedom to grow while letting him know he fully supported him through the process. Sean was grateful for the space and tried to sort out everything he was feeling. The trust and mutual respect for each other matured as much from things left unsaid as from those they shared.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Chapter 5b – Rituals
At the end of another busy week, Sean lay back on the couch waiting for Viggo. Finally there was a Blades game on the telly and they were going to have dinner and few beers while they watched. Tired tonight, thought Sean as he closed his eyes. Trying to keep his all the thoughts and feelings echoing in his brain to a dull roar was pointless. Eventually everything came flooding back. His divorce, relationships, friendships, everything.
How do I end up in the same place time and time again? Thought Sean. God it hurt. Abby accused him of not knowing what his priorities were or what he wanted… Did he even know what he wanted? Sean suddenly felt overwhelmed. At least he had Viggo. Viggo had a way of turning any day around. Sean smiled as he thought about his friend. Daft bugger could make every sunset an event or eating dinner a five sense extravaganza. Amazing things happened with Viggo, the ordinary became extra-ordinary. Then, when you were completely relaxed and cloaked in gentle warmth that surrounded Viggo, he would convey a simple thought or idea. Something seemingly random, that later, on reflection would reveal itself; a gift, given without expectation or guile. Always relevant without making you feel thick or imposed upon. How Viggo always knew what Sean needed – even before Sean did – was at times unsettling but never unwelcome -- it gave Sean great reassurance, he wasn’t alone.
Flashback
”Does dying ever bother you Sean?”
“You mean thinking about dying or having my characters killed all the time?
“The characters. Ever find it hard to let them go?”
“Nah, you know I’m not like you. I just step in and out of their skin for the camera and then move on. Boromir might be a little harder to say good-bye to. Maybe it will just be hard because I’ll be gone and everyone will still be here, carrying on and eventually forgetting me – more like dying, really. It will probably be hard for a while, you know.”
“Yeah, I do. It always amazes me that western culture puts so much emphasis on beginnings and pays so little attention to endings”
“You’re losing me here, Vig”
“Well, let’s see. We have ceremonies or rituals for weddings, christenings, Bar mitzvahs -- all these beginnings. We have very little for endings.”
“We have funerals”
‘Yeah funerals because that final, but what about for other endings. We spend months and in some cases years planning a wedding, a celebration, ceremony, ritual what have you… If that union ends, there is no ritual or ceremony to add closure to that. There’s just lawyers’ pitting both sides against each other.”
“Won’t get an argument out me on that one”
“Don’t you find that odd? In other cultures they honour endings with a ritual or a ceremony. Failures are only failures if you fail to learn. A closing ritual or ceremony honours the lesson and promotes healing. It’s amazingly cleansing”
“Not sure I know what you mean. Honouring failure? Something I’m good at but I’m not sure I want to honour it.”
“Not honouring the failure, acknowledging the lesson – big difference.”
“Losing me again, Vig”
“Okay, how’s this. When Exene and I finally decided to split there were several months of really hurtful behaviour on both our parts. Sometimes, in all the anger you forget that you must have cared, even loved each other at one point. I mean come on, pick any of your exes, I bet you can think of at least one amazing thing that you shared, including but not limited to your children. There must have been something good there right?”
“Sometimes hard to believe but yeah, I would agree with that.”
“Well I felt like I was drowning in anger and resentment and I didn’t like that. What I really wanted was a way to release all of the bitterness wrapped up in the divorce. I went in search of a way to do that. I looked at our own culture and found very little, but other cultures and religions are rich with rituals to honour endings and promote spiritual growth. Ultimately, balance is achieved by honoring your spiritual path and spiritual learning.
“…and you actually did this. Found something, some ‘ritual’ and … what? Danced naked in the rain or some such thing and it made you feel better or what?”
“No, not naked in the rain, though I like your thinking. No the ritual I found is quite beautiful in its simplicity, actually.”
“Go on”
“You just humouring me or do you really want to know?”
“Little of both I guess”
“Fair enough. You start by taking three pieces of paper. You write down your truth as it relates to each of the following; the positive aspects of the relationship, the negative aspects of the relationship and the dream you held of what you wanted the relationship to be. Then you light a fire, burn a candle whatever, something with a flame.”
“Okay so I was wrong about the rain thing but I knew there had to be fire. Any ritual worth its salt has fire.”
“I’m sharing here, Sean”
“Sorry Vig, I know I’m being an arse. All this touchy feely stuff makes me squirm. Really, I’m interested. Truly… go on.”
“Getting back to the fire… You start with the first page and say I’m releasing everything negative in this relationship and read what you wrote and then burn it. You do each of the three and let everything go, releasing everything back to the universe. Sounds simple but it’s really quite amazing.”
“I’d probably end up burning the house down and have the insurance refuse to pay. Maybe if you added chocolate and made some of those s’mores you’re so fond of to the ritual it would catch on…”
End of Flashback
It wasn’t until days later that Sean realized how big an arse he truly was. When Viggo shared things about himself, it was always well thought out and never random. While it wasn’t a chance conversation, the insight was offered without expectations. Sean’s acute embarrassment kept him from exploring the advice further – instead he tucked it away knowing one day he’d go back and further examine the gift Viggo given him.
TBC – contact next chapter I promise, angsty contact, but contact.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Date: 2005-09-13 04:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-13 05:28 pm (UTC)cheers, rb
Hello
Date: 2005-09-14 02:49 am (UTC)