First fic nerves

[elouisa.livejournal.com]

Well, you've gone and made me do it...***edited...please see comments for the reason and I sincerely hope you don't hold it against me***** Please find below my very first RPS fic, please be gentle..

Title: Welcome Back
Author: pipuk psn_cat@yahoo.com

Pairing: SB/VM
Rating:R
Archive: please ask, just let me know where.
Feedback: Yes please good and bad would be appreciated.
Spoilers: n/a
Warnings: More fluff than smut, but a few graphic descriptions near the end.
Disclaimer: This is all made up, I have no knowledge of anyone's preferences and this all happened in my own brain, nowhere else. My brain was a happy place that day. Any flames received will be used to set fire to Ty Beanie Babies. It will be your fault when they die. This has been beta'd so any other errors are my own.

Thanks to: jenmstar for the wonderful beta, natalierichards for the LJ code allowing me to post this and everyone on rugbytackle for the terrific welcome and friendly words of encouragement. "Yer all wunnerful... hic"

Summary: Sean Bean returns to the LOTR set after a short break...




~ *~

Sean had about enough time to turn his head in the direction of where he'd heard someone shout "BEANIE" before he was pounced upon by six feet of elf.

"Bean...it's so good to see you, how have you been, how was your flight,you look tired, have you lost weight?..." Orlando barely took a breath while hanging onto Sean's back and questioning him. Sean slowly smiled as he shrugged off the blonde limpet-like elf."I'm fine Orli, really good" he said with sincerity while hugging him.

Sean Bean had only been away from Wellington for five weeks while he went back to London to see his daughters and do the publicity for "Essex Boys." He'd also had the hard task of finishing off the divorce from Abi. He felt like he'd been away for five years not five weeks and he was so happy to be back. He'd flown in that afternoon and had come straight to the set.. he was so eager to get back.

Still grinning from the warm welcome he'd received from Orlando, Sean walked with him back to the make up trailer so that Orlando could return to mere mortality. On the way back they were stopped every few seconds by people greeting him and welcoming him back to middle earth. Peter smiled his welcome over the top of a bank of monitors and Philippa hugged him warmly and said how glad she was that he was back.

Sean was taken aback by the welcome he was having. He'd never been on a set quite like it. Orlando just laughed at the look on Sean's face and said, "Awww come on... We've missed you man, it's not been the same without our Boromir." They had reached the makeup trailer and Orlando sat in his chair and slowly started to take of his wig and prosthetics

"Where are the Hobbits?" Sean asked settling into the easy chair at the back. He was passed a cup of black coffee by one of the makeup girls and he sipped it while looking at Orlando in the mirror.

"Probably already at the pub I think. They were finished a few hours ago. Vig and I needed to sort out some stuff with Peter about the Helms Deep sequence. It's gonna be a long haul from what I can see....Ummm Sean? Uh, Mmmm..." Orlando started to fiddle with his elf ear which had just been removed. "Have you been to your house yet?"

"No... Why? What aren't you telling me elfboy?" Sean sat forward in his chair, suddenly a bit worried.

"What the boy is so eloquently trying to tell you is that your house is in a bit of a state at the moment." The voice emerged through the curtain behind Sean closely followed by Viggo himself. He was drying his hair on a small towel as he sat down next to Sean.

"There was a really bad storm a couple of days ago and it took a bit of a battering." He put his arm round Sean when his face went pale and continued, "Don't worry, nothing of yours was ruined, but the roof is a write off and some windows need replacing. Newline has sorted out getting it repaired but it's going to take a little while as the storm hit alot of houses".

It all came clear to Sean then. The warm welcome had alot to do with pity. He took a swig of coffee, leaned back again in his chair and said "Ahh, so thats why everyone was being so nice to me out there.." With a smile Viggo simply nodded, ruffled Sean's hair.."that could be it...but we have missed you."

A few hours later Sean was settled on Viggo's couch swigging from a bottle of Newcastle Brown. Viggo had insisted that he *was* staying with him while his house was being sorted and there was *no* arguing about it. Not that Sean had the energy to argue. The jet lag was finally kicking in with a vengeance. The smell of an italian concoction cooking was creating a miasma of basil and oregano in the room and he was being lulled to sleep by the smell and by Viggo quietly humming a nameless tune while he pottered around the kitchen.

Struggling to keep awake, Sean flicked through the channels trying to find some footy to watch. It wasn't happening though, so he settled on the cartoon channel ..his tired mind just enjoying the colours and movement and the memory of once watching Tom & Jerry with his youngest daughter. The joy on her face was the last image in his minds eye before sleep claimed him.

Viggo entered the room with two steaming bowls of pasta and stopped to look at his friend on the couch. Sean was slouched on the seat, arms folded round the bottle of ale as if it were about to be stolen from him. His head was lowered to his chest and he was quietly snoring. Viggo grinned at the sight and thought about leaving him to his dreams. He knew however that Bean hadn't eaten.

~.~

Ever since he first met Sean, Viggo had recognized the desperation and quiet loneliness of the man hidden under the smiles and gruffness. He understood about Sean's marriage problems, and his utter desolation at the thought of what effect his actions were having on his daughters. Viggo knew he had to look after this man whatever it took.

During the first months of shooting when Sean was having a tough time in his life, he just listened and understood and shielded Sean from the worst of the hobbits when they were just *too much*. He made sure that Sean ate even when he would insist he wasn't hungry and ensured he was never allowed to get too drunk and maudlin on nights out.

Over time when trust was earned, recognized, and cherished between them, Viggo was the person Sean would seek out for comfort and support after a nightmare phonecall with Abi or a bitterly sweet phonecall with his daughters. Viggo was honoured he had been given such a role in Sean's life, honoured that he meant so much to Sean. Viggo slowly realised that he would do anything for this man as Viggo had fallen in love with him.

~.~

"Wakey-wakey tired boy," Viggo whispered in Sean's ear as he placed the bowl of food on the table in front of Sean. "You can sleep after you've eaten."

With a yawn and a stretch, Sean smiled and reached for his food thanking Viggo. They ate in silence for a couple of minutes, bathed in the cartoon colours from the television.

"D'ya wanna tell me how it went in London?" Viggo asked. He didn't want to force Sean into a full confessional, he just knew that Sean needed to talk. For the next hour or so, Sean told him everything from the last five weeks.

When Sean talked about the emptiness of his house in London now that his ex wife had moved all her stuff out, about the echoes in his daughter's room he broke. A sob wrenched itself out of his soul and he howled.

The sound broke Viggo's heart and he went to Sean's side to hold him. The hitching and shudders rocked them both but Viggo still held on to Sean with all his strength. He couldn't bear to see the man he loved with all that pain. He wanted to kiss it all away while telling him he was loved and cherished and he wasn't alone and would never be alone again.

Viggo knew however, that he would only be adding to the pain if he revealed his true feelings. Sean loved him as a friend, as a brother but that was it. It wasn't the sort of love that Viggo craved, but if that was all Sean could offer, Viggo would gladly accept it.

Sean was slowly calming in Viggo's arms and relaxing into his chest, and Viggo recognized the tiredness that it was.

"You're not going to fall asleep on me pal, my old bones won't be able to last the night on this couch. Lets get you to bed."

"Thanks mate," Sean loosened himself from Viggo's arms and got up from the couch. He stood and looked straight into Viggo's eyes with a small sad smile on his lips. There was no shame in his face, only a tired resignation of the situation he found himself in.

"What the fuck am I going to do Vig?"

Such a simple question to which Viggo had no answer.

"Let's figure it out in the morning. You need to sleep," Viggo replied, his heart was hurting so much for his friend.

He got up from the couch and helped Sean with his bags. They walked through the hallway and made their way to the bedrooms. Vig's was next door to the bathroom and he pointed Sean to the guest room opposite. Viggo's blood was coursing through his body and the air became tense as he realised that he didn't want Sean to spend the night in that room, he wanted him in his room, in his bed.

"I'm just gonna clean up and stuff," he said quickly while going to the bathroom door. "Y'know where I am if you need me in the night. Sleep well." Viggo didn't wait for a reply before entering the bathroom and shutting the door. He leaned against it for a couple of minutes while he gathered his thoughts. He wanted desperately to help Sean but the thoughts and desires going through his mind were getting too much for him and he was frightened that he might reveal them to Sean if he wasn't careful.

"Fuck Vig, grow up. You're not fifteen anymore and Sean doesn't need his life confused any more than it is. Get a fucking grip."

He berated himself for making things awkward for Sean when all he really needed was a friend.

After brushing his teeth and cleaning up, Viggo unlocked the bathroom door... to find the door opposite open and Sean sat on the bed in an oversize T shirt and boxers looking plaintively towards him.

"You OK?" Viggo asked.

Looking back at the floor Sean responded "Vig... I'm not sure how... whether you'd... Awww, fuck Vig, will you, will you stay with me tonight?"

Viggo's breathing stopped. He couldn't have imagined that could he? He walked slowly over to Sean and lifted his chin carefully with his right hand so Sean was looking up.

"What do you want from me?" Viggo quietly asked.

"I haven't been held like you held me earlier for years. Possibly never. I... I want you to hold me again. Just so I don't feel so alone."

Viggo was shocked. His friend Sean Bean, the heroic Sharpe to some, the evil Lovelace to others, the man Elijah once called 'The blokes bloke' was yearning for comfort, for safety... to be held. He was asking Viggo for this.

Viggo was honored and filled with affection for Sean as he reached his other hand to Sean's face. He leaned his head down to kiss Sean's forehead and was shocked when Sean moved his head so that their lips met.

Viggo stopped for a second thinking "FUCK, what have I just done?" but was stopped mid thought when Sean's lips moved over his. A small moan came from Sean's throat and suddenly Viggo couldn't think anymore.

They kissed with every passion they had ever had. Tongues intertwined, tasted and conquered over and over again. They broke for a breath and looked at each other. Sean lowered his gaze before quietly speaking.

"Whoa.. I thought I'd never have the bollocks to do that."

"What?.. Do you mean you planned this?" Viggo was incredulous, a small smile developing on his face. Could this be true? Had they both wanted this all along?

"I wasn't sure. I just knew I felt something for you before I went back to London. I've had five weeks to think about it and I knew that if I saw you again and felt the same, I'd have to do something about it. My feelings hadn't changed when I saw you in makeup this afternoon. I... I wasn't sure if you felt the same until you held me today."

He took a deep breath and looked up at Viggo again through his fringe "Do you mind this?.. I'm sorry if it's too much. We can forget it ever happened if this isn't what you want"

Viggo was overwhelmed. He couldn't speak, didn't have the words to respond, so he responded in the only way possible. His lips met Sean's in a ferocious kiss that took them both into animal lust. Laying him down on the bed, Viggo straddled his hips and proceeded to worship every part of Sean with his lips. Both nipples, every nerve ending was touched causing Sean to gasp and moan. For so long Viggo had imagined being with Sean, but he had never imagined that he would be able to coax such noises out of him.

Viggo made his way down to Sean's oh so hard cock and took it into his mouth. Sean had never known such a feeling. Sure, his three ex wives and the women in between had done this to him but none had been able to cause such sensations as Viggo was now doing. This feeling, along with the joy of finally revealing his love to Viggo, quickly became too much. Sean tried to pull Viggo away from his cock as he didn't want to force Viggo into swallowing but Viggo just batted his hands away and used his tongue to caress the head and slit of Sean's cock. Sean came, shuddering and crying, flooding Viggo's mouth with cum. Viggo continued sucking until Sean's cock became soft and his breathing returned to a normal rhythm, then crawled up Sean's body to kiss him slowly back down to earth.

"My God Vig... that was heaven. Thank you." Sean's face was flushed and sweating as Viggo kissed and licked it all over. He pulled back and looked him in the eye.

"Why didn't you tell me before... you stupid moron" The last word punctuated with a small head butt followed by a kiss to the forehead.

With a shy smile Sean replied "Because I was a stupid, shy, resolutely heterosexual until I met Viggo Mortensen moron before. It didn't even occur to me that I could fall in love with a man. I was in the middle of yet another fucking relationship implosion when I met you and I didn't want to confuse things even more than they were."

Viggo smiled to himself acknowledging that he had done the right thing in not taking action himself before. He started to undress as Sean continued.

"Being away from you for so long made me realise that I loved you"

Naked now, Viggo climbed under the covers and drew Sean to him. "I love you too," Viggo said kissing him on his temple.

Sean's eyes were closing and he yawned as he snuggled down alongside Viggo, his arm draped over Viggo's chest. Viggo's cock was still hard as he had gotten so horny giving his all to Sean, but he was not bothered in the slightest. He looked down at Sean in his arms who was already nearly asleep and smiled. There was more than enough time for Sean to show Viggo how much he loved him and he was in no doubt he would give as good as he took.

"Vig? D'ya think if I asked them nicely, the builders will take three times as long to mend my house?" Sean dozily whispered into Viggo's chest.

Viggo snorted and snuggled closer. Shutting his eyes he replied, "I'm going to pay them not to finish the job Bean because you're not going anywhere".

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Well, you've gone and made me do it... you've dragged me down to your level.. I hope you're all proud of yourselves for corrupting yet another :-P

This comment may be tongue-in-cheek, but as a word to the wise-- it's probably not the best way to introduce yourself to any RPS community. Many RPS writers have been unfairly persecuted and insulted for writing RPS. It's not sensible for you to come into this genre, asking for acceptance and critical gentleness for your story, while simultaneously insulting your fellow RPS writers and readers by implying that RPS is less valid and less good than other kinds of fanfic.

It's not very diplomatic and it really touches a hot button. Why do you feel you have to express a feeling of having been superior because you didn't write RPS? Why do you feel that by joining us, you've been dragged down or reduced in some way? Maybe we feel like you've been dragged *up.* At the very least, most of us feel that RPS should be respected on a par with any other fanfic genre.

Sorry to rant at you. As I said, it's a hot button.

[elouisa.livejournal.com]

Oh God....It honestly wasn't meant in a bad way...what I meant was I haven't written before ..anything.. and I had mentioned so in other comments on rugbytackle. I was encouraged by so many to write and my comments were referring to being persuaded to write...not just in terms of rps...in terms of anything. I meant being corrupted into writing...I love reading rps and see it as on a par with any other fanfic, if not better. I admire every writer i've read in rugbytackle and I'm just an a faker trying my best. If I've offended at all I apologise profusely. I will edit it now but as you have quoted me people will know what your comment is iro. Thank you for pointing out my error...honestly. I'm new to all this and I didn't think. Once again all apologies

[amentiii.livejournal.com]

Resolutely in denial that any unpleasantness occurs in Rugbytackle-land. Other than the angsty kind in which those silly boys don't manage to find their way to the hot, steamy sex . . .

This is your first story ever? I enjoyed it very much. I think you did a fine job of showing the difficulty of trying to begin a relationship with someone who's in the middle of deconstructing another one.

Hope to see more of your writing soon.

[elouisa.livejournal.com]

*hides face as it is going very very red*

Thank you so much. (^-^)

[karelian]

What a completely and totally lovely thing to wake up to! I adore poor Viggo trying not to scare Sean, not realizing that Sean is on the same page. Welcome!

[elouisa.livejournal.com]

*G* Thank you.. I s'pose one of the benefits to being on the other side of the pond is that I get to wake up to the great fics you've been creating while I sleep and in return I will try and do some more for you to wake up to :-)

[jennandanica.livejournal.com]

well, i know exactly what you were trying to say and would not have been/am not offended. i also think that if someone feels they have a valid point to make, they should make it under their user name. but that's just mho.

that said, lovely first effort. hot and sweet. i like your sean and viggo *g* hope to see more from you.

[elouisa.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much (^-^) *hugs*

[lunasv.livejournal.com]

Nicely done.
favorite moment: "Why didn't you tell me before... you stupid moron" The last word punctuated with a small head butt followed by a kiss to the forehead. Just so fucking adorable and realistic.

[elouisa.livejournal.com]

Thanks.. :o) I just knew that Viggo would have a huge cheesy grin on his face doing that, he wouldn't be able to help himself. I'm glad you enjoyed that part and I really appreciate your comments.

[helens78]

What a lovely first fic! Thank you so much for sharing it! :)

[elouisa.livejournal.com]

Thanks :-) I'm really glad you enjoyed it. All these comments are really encouraging me to write some more :O). I've not enjoyed writing since college (2000 word non fiction essays to be written on 2 hours will do that for you ;O{...) so my enjoyment of writing is a wonderful surprise to me. Thanks

[bookofdays.livejournal.com]

oh that was lovely. You're really sure it's your first fic? I strongly suggest that you write again. Because yes, it's good. Very good.

"I'm going to pay them not to finish the job Bean because you're not going anywhere".

Hey, I'll pay them too!

[elouisa.livejournal.com]

I think my last piece of fictional writing was about a ballerina who won a place at dance college written when I was about 13.

Thank you so much for your kind words. I'm really going to try and write more..

[jenmstar.livejournal.com]

Hey there! I already responded to your email, but I had to leave a note here. First, I loved the fic. Second, I am no where near offended (I take it as a compliment myself). Third, go write more. So yeah, good job. Just wanted to congratulate you again!

[milochka.livejournal.com]

Yay, your first fic! Very nicely done... your Sean and Viggo are simply adorable. And definitely, I want to see more of this!

Viggo quietly humming a nameless tune while he pottered around the kitchen

Love that image -- seems very true to character. I can just picture it! :-) And I really like Viggo's sense of respect for Sean and what he's going through, that also seems very true to character. Good job!

[zillah975]

First, I thought your comment was cute and I understand exactly how you feel! Wasn't offended in the least.

Second, I quite liked your story - 'specially the welcome Sean got on returning to the set, and the sweet way Viggo responded to his friend's hurt. Lovely. Looking forward to more. :)

[shrinetolust.livejournal.com]

Wow, excellent first fic. Please do write more! I love this...Sean and Viggo are so well-developed. I love Viggo's fighting so hard with himself..he has such feelings for Sean but also has consideration for him and doesn't want to hurt him.

I also love this:

For so long Viggo had imagined being with Sean, but he had never imagined that he would be able to coax such noises out of him.

I am very into noises *G* so this really resonated with me.

And I like the added touch of Sean not wanting to force Viggo to swallow--brilliant little moment that says so much about Sean's character.

Just lovely.

And as for the unrelated comments, I certainly would hope no one else was offended. Goodness, I have seen and partaken in a lot of teasing about corrupting and being corrupted, and it's all meant in fun. Slash writing has to be some of the best fiction I've ever read and I have respect for it as a genre for sure. We all do; else we wouldn't be here!

So bravo to you for your writing...and encore, encore!! :P