January 2008 Challenge at drabblechalleng

[rifleman-s.livejournal.com]

Title: Seasons Pass
Author: rifleman_s
Characters: Sean & Viggo
Warnings: None
Word Count: 100
Archive: Rugbytackling
Disclaimer: I made it all up, truly! No offence intended to anyone.

Written for: January 2008 Challenge at drabblechalleng


Based on this picture:




Seasons Pass

The first time, walking dogs, they rested apart, either end. Times after that they sat close, touching. Then they walked up as one, holding hands and sat huddled together for warmth, kissing and whispering while the dogs capered. Once, one had a ring in a small box which he offered, and shed tears when accepted. Once they argued and stayed away for days.

The seasons pass. Snow falls and they add more clothes. Sunshine gleams and they shed those clothes. The dogs grow old, then young ones appear, but always the men come here together. My name is “our bench”.

~End~

Comments

[afra_schatz]

Very nicely done. It's always difficult to to this from an object's pov and more often than not I find stories like this 'forced' to some extend, but not this. The namelessness of the two men and the short but very meaningful glances at their lives at this place, on this bench work very nicely.

[rifleman-s.livejournal.com]

Thank you ever so much.

I think the shortness of the drabble format is always useful here; I can weave a little 'back story' without too much detail and leave the rest to the imagination.

I'm glad you found meaning in it; that's most encouraging. :)

[alex-quine.livejournal.com]

This is deceptively 'plain', with simple language and no elaborate imagery, but it speaks to the rhythm of lives well lived and time passing, particularly in the matching sentences about the clothes added and clothes shed. Very effective. Thanks for posting.

[rifleman-s.livejournal.com]

I do find the shortness of the drabble format and these 'non people' pictures create a 'back story' more easily, and it was nice to relate the bench's constancy to the men's constant relationship.

Thank you for your lovely words, Alex - most encouraging.

[clocks.livejournal.com]

Have I mentioned how you are my favouritest drabbler ever? :) You always write the best VigBean drabbles. Here's my favourite part:

Snow falls and they add more clothes. Sunshine gleams and they shed those clothes. The dogs grow old, then young ones appear, but always the men come here together. My name is “our bench”.

Sigh. Such utter sweetness. You spoke volumes about a life together with treasured memories and you managed to convey it all with just a bench! Lovely.

Thanks for sharing this with us!

[rifleman-s.livejournal.com]

I'm overwhelmed by such a wonderful compliment. *takes a deep bow*

I love having pieces quoted back, too - it's aways interesting to see what moves people, so thank you also for that.

The continuing life together no matter what was just was I wanted to portray, so I'm glad you found that within the words.

Thank you very much.

[ex-warmfuzzi813.livejournal.com]

So simple but says so much.

[rifleman-s.livejournal.com]

There's no better compliment to a Drabble writer . . . thank you so much! :)